99 Bottles of Beer

We all know how the story begins, but how many of us actually know how it ends? 
99 Bottles of Beer – EXPOSED! 
99 bottles of beer on the wall 99 bottles of beer Take one down, pass it around, 98 bottles of beer on the wall.
And so the party begins. Four friends sitting on old beat-up lawn chairs in a garage, sharing stories, remembering good times, and enjoying plenty of laughs. 
82 bottles of beer on the wall 82 bottles of beer Take one down, pass it around, 81 bottles of beer on the wall.
With a nice little buzz beginning to soften their senses, the volume of both the music and their stories slowly increases.  The funnel has been brought out of storage, and now swings from the ceiling, the beer pong table becoming increasingly moist.
69 bottles of beer on the wall 69 bottles of beer Take one down, pass it around 68 bottles of beer on the wall.
“CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG!!!”  The party now in full swing, all four friends howl with laughter.  “Hey look what I found… Lawn Darts!!  We so gotta play this!!!”  “Are we seriously all out of chips?”  “Ohhhh Def Leppard!!! Turn that up!!!”
46 bottles of beer on the wall 46 bottles of beer Take one down, pass it around 45 bottles of beer on the wall.
“Hahahahaha!!!!  Look at Bill!!!!!!” as Bill lays passed out in sitting in a blue recycling bin.  “Pfft… What a pussy!!!”  They take a black permanent marker and draw penis designs all over his forehead.  Finding his cell phone, they take photos, hack into his Facebook account, and post them.  “Hahahaha, we’re awesome!!” followed by a round of high fives.
29 bottles of beer on the wall 29 bottles of beer Take one down, pass it around 28 bottles of beer on the wall.
“LET’S GO STREAKING!!!!”  The three of them strip down and run bare-assed out into the night.
28 bottles of beer on the wall 28 bottles of beer Thrown in jail, waiting for bail, 28 bottles of beer on the wall.
Bill’s cell phone rings, awakening him from his drunken stupor.  Sore back and all alone, he wonders where everyone went.  “Hello?” he mutters.  It’s one of his buddies filling him in on the little situation they’ve gotten themselves into, and asking him to come bail them out.  “You gotta come get us man!  And whatever you do, don’t tell my wife!”
28 bottles of beer on the wall 28 bottles of beer Take one down, pass it around 27 bottles of beer on the wall.
“Bad boys, bad boys, watcha gonna do, whatcha gonna do when they come for you!” they sing loudly together, arms around one another, and now fully clothed and back in the safe confines of the garage.  “Oh I was totally not scared! Hahahaha, you were shitting your pants in there, but not me!!”  “I can’t pee when other people are watching, alright, and I really had to go.  Leave me alone!”  “You guys are assholes, why did you have to draw on my face?”
15 bottles of beer on the wall 15 bottles of beer Take one down, pass it around 14 bottles of beer on the wall.
“Was that fridge there the whole time?  Why is your beer on the wall, and not in the fridge?  Dipshit, no wonder the mountain isn’t blue!!!”  “No, you’re the dipshit!!  Go buy your own beer you fuckin’ mooch!!”  “Why didn’t you buy more chips?!!!”  “Who am I, your mother?!!”  “Hey, don’t you talk about my Mom like that!!!  I’ll kick your ass!!!”
1 bottle of beer on the wall 1 bottle of beer Take it down, pass it around No more bottles of beer on the wall.
“Sun’s starting to come up.  You wanna shot of tequila?”  “{{hiccup}}  Nah, I’m good... I think I’m gonna hurl…”  “Huh, what’s with all these Facebook messages?............ YOU ASSHOLES!!!!!”
The truth behind “99 bottles of beer on the wall”… regrettably, more shameful than glamorous.