8:24pm
Dear Diary,
I don’t know what is wrong, but I have lost all motivation to do anything. I don’t want to go to lectures, I don’t want to study for exams (which are only 19 days away!), I don’t want to lift weights (it used to be my favourite thing to do), I don’t even want to socialise with people. Is something wrong with me??
Exams are in 19 days. I haven’t studied at all, and I’m about 60 to 70 lectures behind now. I don’t have motivation to study. I don’t care as much as I did. I can’t make it into Medicine next year. I have lost many of my friends. I’m scared that the university year is ending so soon. I wish this year went better, but it didn’t.
Today I chickened out of asking my ex girlfriend to just be friends. I was going to ask her today, if she wanted to be friends. I don’t know if she wants to be friends or not, but I do, because that’s how I saw things years ago (that I could be friends with my exes after we break up, especially my first girlfriend). The last time I spoke to her (3 weeks ago) she hated me. She may have cooled down now, but I don’t know, and that’s why I chickened out.
I even skipped all my lectures today, which makes me even further behind. My 40 press ups a day challenge isn’t going well, I keep forgetting to do it in the mornings. Everything is falling apart, and I don’t know what to do to fix it.
Yours, -Harper
