It’s occurred to me in recent days that 2WC has been slacking on one of our sworn duties as founding members of the AGTF (Anti-Gnome Task Force…of course) So first, I must apologize for sleeping on the job.
Next I must applaud those who have stayed vigilant as we let the lawn ornaments have a free pass. Not all were turning a blind eye on the gnome crisis, threatening our nation’s lawns. Some have been doing their duty as we let the little demons roam free.
A woman in Florida was recently asked to remove all statues from her front lawn or face a fine of $100/month from her neighborhood’s homeowner’s association. A small price to pay for the safety of the greater good.
In addition to the evil dwarf, her lawn was populated by a stone angel, pelican, and a few egrets. I shudder to think what may have befallen us all if the little demon had been able to bring the winged statuary over to the dark side.
…the gnome zombie apocalypse…are you prepared?
Props and thanks to the nosy…I mean vigilant…head of the neighborhood association who spotted this community danger and nipped it in the bud. Thank goodness they were able to see past their own lawn adornments (an ornamental fountain and cat statue apparently…classy) in order banish this threat from their neighbor’s lawn before anyone was injured.
Where would we all be with out the care of our neighbors? Who knows, but the gnomes would, they always do. Stay vigilant.
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TIME: Code Police! 6 Things That May Surprisingly Be Banned in Your Front Yard
…bi-daily smile…
For those wondering what inspired this gnome-eradicating crusade, just watch…and take notes…nowhere is safe:
