But then when I saw the opportunity to join Channel Mum and have something that would give me that sort of kick-up-the-bum I needed to challenge myself and push myself out of my comfort zone, I decided I would fight back against my anxiety and really push myself by starting something I'd always wanted to do but felt too anxious to do before.
You see, I couldn't do it at first, no really - I couldn't. When I turned that camera on, my anxiety became crippling. I couldn't get the words to come out of my mouth. I was so frustrated at myself and upset that I very nearly gave up.
I sent an email to Channel Mum explaining as best I could that I couldn't get the words to come out of my mouth. I pressed send on the email and I felt defeated. I felt like I had let myself down and that I had stood in my own way.
Feeling as defeated as I did then turned out to be exactly what I needed. I was angry, angry at how anxious I was and angry at myself for giving in. But that's exactly what I needed to feel. I received the most supportive and encouraging reply and it was a mixture of those two things, that made me press record again. I was going to do it, no matter how many times I had to repeat each word over and over again, I wasn't going to just quit.
It's been over a year since then now and whilst I'm no-where near where I'd like to be in terms of beating my camera-anxiety, I'm doing it and I'm doing it successfully. Not only do I love doing what I'm doing and love how it pushes and challenges me and how it allows me to connect with others through video, I'm now able to make a bit of a living out of filming my videos and putting them online.
And so I wanted to sit down and write this post and share a few snippets of advice that I as an anxious vlogger would give to someone who feels the same or similar to how I did when I first started. So here goes..
1. Don't hate the sound of your own voice.
Your voice is your voice and it isn't going to ever change. It's unlikely that you walk around not talking to people just because you don't like the way your voice sounds, so please don't let it stop you from being on camera. You never know you may just find that you have someone leave you a comment who loves your accent and the way you talk.
2. Don't worry if you can't do it in one take, or two, or three.
Personally, I actually don't even do takes. I film myself continuously or even film little snippets and when I say something wrong or stumble over my words or feel anxious, I repeat what I was saying and edit it together. I repeat myself over and over sometimes because I can't get what I want to say out. When you edit it all together as long as you can get what it is that you're saying to flow, it'll usually work :)
3. Start small.
I've recently discovered Snapchat (I'm always late to the party!) and I was thinking how awesome it would be for those just starting out with vlogging or those who want to get in to it. It's so easy to film a tiny snippet of yourself and press send! No editing, no polished look, just real simple video and a great way to build your confidence up.
4. Try what works for you.
For me, a great way for me to introduce the idea of putting my videos on to youtube was to create monthly montages (those general, everyday snippets and clips that we've filmed throughout the month of fun moments together as a family) or to make montage style videos of our holidays or days-out. There's no talking involved, all the sound is edited out (unless it's a really cute moment I want to be able to listen back to) and then I overlay the clips when all edited together with music). Do what works for you.
5. Don't give up after a couple of tries.
Keep at it. With anything - the more you do it, the better you'll get and the more confident you'll feel. It may come naturally for you which would be fantastic, but if it doesn't, it doesn't necessarily mean it's not for you. Give yourself a fair shot and remember that even those that earn a living from putting videos online get nervous and sometimes get it wrong.
I hope these tips were helpful. Let me know if you're new to or are thinking about joining YouTube. I'd love to come and check out your channel. :) x
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