Self Expression Magazine

No Energy What So Ever

Posted on the 02 September 2012 by Courtyb34 @CourtyB34
I stayed up till 3:00 in the morning last night. I didn't feel good and had bad stomach aches. So, I didn't sleep for very long last night, resulting in me being tired. I have no energy because School is about to start. Tuesday I start school. I only have to be there for half of the day because I don't have CAL till Wednesday. But I am not ready to start school yet. I feel like I won't have fun or a life during school. I feel like all I will be doing is school work and nothing else. I don't want to cry all night about a stupid math test. I don't want to cry all night about an assignment. I have gone nights without eating dinner because I had homework. It was last year, everybody else was eating dinner and I was in my room, doing my homework and then when everybody else was going to bed, I was still doing homework. I hardly ate sophomore year because I was so busy with homework and school. Just don't want that to happen again. I hated sophomore year school work and homework, but the year with the people was ok. No huge drama. Little flares but they ironed out. Most of them :). I have no energy... No energy for school... No energy for homework, no energy for studying or tests. Right now, I just want to be in a car, or on a plane, or something. I want to be listening to music or cooking and baking. I want to be relaxed. I thought I was excited about school starting but I seriously don't want to deal with the freshmen. New freshmen coming in... That is the worst. I know I was a freshmen once, but I wasn't a crazy wacky freshmen. I was just a person dodging the upper classmen and dodging the people who thought they were cool. I have changed A LOT since freshmen year. I have changed a lot since sophomore year. I feel like throwing up because I am so nervous about school starting. Nervous I won't get things in in time. Worried I will have no friends in classes. Worried I will get stuck on math and can't get help. I don't have an IS (Independent Study) anymore, I gave that up for French. At least I don't have to take PD3 this year, I can take it next year. Not a problem. Today went by way too fast. I don't even understand that. I am in a whirl wind and it's not stopping long enough for me to catch my breath. I need it to stop for just a second. You know what I need? I need to go to a yoga community, or a yoga school for like a month. Collect myself and have relaxation and mental cleansing. I need those kinds of mental cleansing exercises that help me focus! I can focus on school, but I also need to focus on life. I need to do some yoga. I seriously need to do some. It calms me down, makes me feel great! And helps me relax. I had a yoga class at school freshmen year. Every other day I had that class, on Blue Days, and I would feel so awesome after that class. It would be at the end of the day, in Lifetime Fitness and it would feel so good! Yoga also helps you live longer and makes you limber. It helps stretches your muscles and helps your flexibility. I need to start doing that more. Doing yoga on my own. Anyway, I hope that school won't be as stressful as it was last year. I really really hope so! I feel better now, writing it all down. :) Still a bit nervous... No Energy What So Ever

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