As you know, I am expecting my first child. This can be so overwhelming and I know that other first time moms probably feel the same. I have so many questions and would love to hear the opinions of moms who have already been through this a time or two before. Because of this, I am hosting a weekly series to try and get some answers to some of the most common questions.Here are the topics we still have for future weeks:
So without further ado, let's get on with Week 20: How To Stay Connected To Your Partner! Since I do not have any children of my own yet, I will be featuring a blogger each week and their expert advice on the topic at hand (:
How To Stay Connected To Your Partner:
Hi y’all! I’m Amanda from over at 3 lil’ apples. I am a youthful 30 year old wife to a hard working railroader, mom to 3 well behaved, yet sometimes rambunctious kids, with another arriving in October. A wife and mommy which stays at home, who loves writing, experimenting with blog design, and volunteering my time when it is available. I am visiting Ms. Kaitlyn today to help her “Preparing for a Little One” series. I will be sharing my sense on maintaining the fire with your flame once baby arrives.
So, you and yours have made the decision to go forth with the baby carriage stage of the relationship? It is a beautiful time and life changing experience for the two of you. Ideas of what little him or her will look like, choosing names, outfits, and all the accessories. All of which is important and exciting, allowing a way to connect with each other and your unborn baby. Let’s not leave that connection to the side because of all the baby excitement.
I am so uncomfortable, which the process of getting the baby into the carriage is a development that is well…uncomfortable. Barely being able to move, walking across the room to be out of breath, and don’t ask me to tie my shoes, please. Whiney, yes, I know. So where, between all the excitement and uneasy whining, is the level of connection with our partner? There are many stages of a relationship during and after pregnancy. You and your partner are the only ones who know where that status is. I am just here to give you tips on how to keep what you’ve got going.
The first and most important tip will always be to communicate discussing anything and everything with your significant other. Without healthy verbalization you have nothing.
…during pregnancy
- Demonstrate bonding with choosing a name for baby, shopping for necessary baby items, taking a birthing class together, deciding on a birth plan, and even touring the hospital where you’ll deliver. Taking turns singing or reading books to baby in womb.
- Make special time each day to talk, asking your partner how their day was, be a listening ear for one another, and getting into the habit of having a discussion. Whether it is over dinner or before turning out the lights, will only make it easier to continue once the baby arrives.
- Let the fun commence on trips and dates with your flame, be active in going somewhere or participate in doing activities either of you have never done, or been. Make it a memorial event of one last time before baby. Take pictures and have fun.
…once baby arrivesTime seems to have been lost. You and your partner are adjusting to sleepless nights and days, along with getting to know your newest little roommate. Times where you might feel like you will never spend another moment alone together, which is often true. Ways to make the best use of time with baby nearby, when you don’t have a babysitter.
- Continue to communicate because there are many stresses that come with having a baby. Discuss what each of you are feeling and find a middle grounded solution to help one another hurdle through the first months with baby.
- The baby will sleep a lot so take advantage of that time to do something important with your love.
- Play board games for a healthy competition giving each of you some one on one fun time while baby dozes. If baby wakes, make sure you both go and checks, so no one takes an unfair advantage. My husband and I have often enjoyed our favorite adult beverage with a good card or board game.
- Become a Netflix/RedBox consumer otherwise you may never see a movie again. Together choose a movie you’ve never seen, sit down, relax, cuddle, snack on a sweet or salty treat, and enjoy the show. The days of stadium seating and surround theater sound are now behind you take in the moment you have together in the comfort of your home, and you can always hit pause if the monitor starts buzzing.
- Never ever put the baby in the bed with you it is a hard habit to break. This is just my opinion, because co-sleeping works better for some parents than for others. By the time 6 weeks post-partum comes around both you and your significant other may be bound toward each other by wild desire. Most often the tango is stepped on the bed, and baby shouldn’t interfere with that firery ring.
- In addition to the above paragraph Get Creative and Make-Out with where you and your partner dance. It is fun, intriguing, and it gives you a feeling of youthfulness. Even have a make-out session, play hard to get for several days, deepen the yearning, so once the guard is down you both will be focused on each other’s pleasure.
- Lastly, Do not be selfish with your own wants, and give a little into your partner. Consider what they may want, putting that ahead of you. If 6 weeks comes along and daddy or mommy needs a break, then let them go. If daddy needs a beer with the guys or mommy needs a pedicure with the girls. Even as adults with families we still need our independence, and taking your turn to stay with the baby allows that freedom.
I hope you’ve enjoyed my visit with Kaitlyn, that my tips on staying connected after baby will in some way benefit you and yours relationship. All of what I’ve shared today has been experimented by my husband and I, and has worked in deepening our connection while having not just one child, but three. I wish you all the best in maintaining the fire with your flame.
-------------------------------------------Grab A Button & Link Up!
