The Pie-d Piper (Trust Me, This Is A Super Clever Title)

As most of my friends know, I have a really strong intuition.  I'd even venture to label myself mildly psychic.  I read fortunes in coffee quite well, and I have premonitory dreams, and occasionally I'll have a really strong gut feeling about something that I've found nearly always proves right.
Well I had one such gut feeling on the drive up here to New York.  We passed through SO many little towns on the freeway, and some of them had stronger vibes than others, but this one random-ass little place gave me chills up and down my spine just from the couple miles it took to pass over it.  Ask Tyler how intense my vibe was.  I was totally like "dude, we need to definitely not stop in this place and in fact, let's speed a little bit right now.  Just a little." 
Okay, so I'm not actually that funny in the moment and I mostly just furrowed my brow and wrung my hands and said a few times how I really just wanted to get past the place.  But same deal.
I went to the bother of looking it up on the internet later, and apparently it's a pretty typical little upstate town, about 50,000 people, 97% white, super low crime rates, etc.  But that didn't offset my bad vibes--in fact, I think it solidified them.
I was just talking to my sister Molly about this today.  I was telling her what I had told Tyler at the time, that the place seemed like one of those creepy movies where the couple on the road trip stops at the cute little small-town diner, where everyone is sitting around eating pie, and then they slowly start to realize that everyone is fucking weird and something strange is going on, and then they get stuck in the town and everyone dies and/or turns out to be a zombie.
And she was like "oh right, or where the pie ends up being made of people."  And we giggled about that, and then I was like "actually the place was called Hamburg, isn't that the name of the town the Pied Piper stole all the children from?"  And we looked it up and it was totally Hamlin, not Hamburg, but I had thought of it and that was the point.  And we decided that if you stop in the mostly-white, upper-middle-class, cutesy little town of Hamburg, NY, you would discover that all the creepy people eating pie were actually eating children pie.  The couple could start to notice things like the people's hands all shaking and that they somehow didn't see children anywhere, and that the pot pie they assumed to be chicken (everything tastes like chicken, right?) seemed to be a little off...it was perfectly creepy.  Because Molly and I are totally creepy and should write horror movies, apparently.
So stay away from Hamburg, NY and always listen to your gut.  And also don't eat children.  That's just not nice.
(All slants against the town of Hamburg, NY, the story of the Pied Piper, diners, pie enthusiasts and horror writers are purely for entertainment purposes and are not to be taken seriously and/or libelously. I'm possibly reading The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo and therefore a little jumpy about libel suits. Thank you for your sense of humor.)