Well then, today I am going to surprise you. Today, I am not going to write a really long post.
No.
Today, I am going to let some pictures do the talking for me. Just a little bit. I will talk too but less. Nothing like mixing it up a little eh? And maybe all you rockin’ followers who sigh and say too long when you see my other posts will actually stop by and read! Hurrah! That’s not why I’m doing it but hey, it would be a cool bonus.
So today when I was going to my favorite ever coffee shop I parked at a different end of the street than usual, so I had the absolute pleasure of passing this clothes shop. Look at what I saw in the window.
Shoulders back and head up lovely
I know, let’s display these clothes on really unrealistic poses.
Do you see what I see?
I see two life-sized dolls standing in poses I’ve never seen a human stand in before. Except for perhaps a super model and only briefly. A flexible super model.
(oh and yes I also see a big whack of sunshine across one of the pics – couldn’t seem to get the pic without it I’m afraid)
I thought it was all a bit weird so I snapped the pics and moved on.
I got to thinking about the photos later in the day and I started wondering if it was humanly possible to even pull these poses. So I had a crack at it. Here’s what it looked like.
Hips forward, shoulders back AND thrust
Do you like how I put on the scarf and the sunnies to look the part? I’m too cool.
This pose was reeeeeeeeeally awkward. As you can see here I didn’t get it right but I’m certain I would have if I hadn’t had to twist the shoulder to take the picture. I can tell you now that this was not comfortable in any way, shape or form AT ALL. No one EVER just hangs around standing like this.
Shoulders back, titties out
Oh dear. Words fail me.
This pose was actually the more difficult of the two. You can’t see it well here as I am facing front on to the mirror so basically I stuffed it up. But my shoulders are back as far as they can go and at one point I got a little nerve niggle in the back. It wasn’t good. You can tell how far back I am arching as my “six pack” is protruding nicely. I know what you are going to say. Sexy. That’s why I couldn’t help but post the pictures.
So what was the purpose of all this? What did I learn from the today? Well, a number of things actually.
1. It’s unlikely that I’ll ever become a supermodel as I can’t do the poses without wincing (yes, all 5’2″ of me learnt that JUST today)
2. The reason clothes never look the same on you as they do in the window of the shop is that the life-sized dolls aren’t very life like at all.
3. A scarf and a big pair of glasses does an ok job at hiding your face (good to know for when fame hits for being a pretend supermodel on the internet).
4. It’s far far far far far too easy to make a dick of yourself on the internet these days.
Enjoy.
