I've got a three year old who is still getting used to a change of hours and a new pre-school whist potty training and slowly giving up his naps. I've got a one year old who has two molars coming through at once and who seems to be nocturnal. I've got a house that never seems to stay tidy for more than five minutes and a washing basket that refills faster than I can empty it. Through exhaustion from a lack of sleep and a general busyness from having two young children, I seem to never be able to stay on top of my work and feel like I'm always taking time away from Adam, who at this time of the year is crazy busy on his own business.
I'm definitely developing a bit of a hate for the clock, which just seems to keep speeding up! But when you're a busy Mum, hiding under the duvet for the day just isn't an option (sadly) so I've been working on focusing on the things that bring me back up when it all feels a bit much. Here are my top ten tips to de-tress in less than ten minutes!
1. A long shower in the evening
It's a simple one, but trying to cram a shower in during the busy day, just feels rushed and no where near as nice as taking a shower in my own time and spending as long as I like in there. When I shower in the evening I let my brain do a bit of thinking and I catch up on thoughts that I often don't have time for during the day. Or I simply switch off and just enjoy the warm water and a bit of peace.
2. Writing stuff down
When my head feels jammed, writing whatever is in there down is like a way for me to get it out and un-jam my head. Things can seem bigger than they really are until I write them down. I also love the pure satisfaction of physically ticking something off of a list once I've done whatever it is!
3. Breathing!
Of course I'm breathing all day everyday, but what I mean is taking deep breaths and becoming more aware of my breaths in general. Focusing on my breathing when I'm feeling overwhelmed seems to help me relax. Adam has this breathing app or thing that pops up on his Apple Watch which we've done together, it's quite funny doing it together if nothing else sometimes.
4. Listening to a bit of music
I really find that a bit of music usually helps me to de-stress and just crack on rather than over think. In fact I'm listening to music as I type this now. The music I choose depends on my mood, but calming music (sort of like the sort you'd find in a spa) is guaranteed to leave me so much more chilled. Plus if the boys are hogging the TV, I put music on in the kitchen and feel like I have my own little thing!
5. Cleaning and getting places around the house organised
I wasn't sure if this was just the clean-freak in me, but apparently it's not. Rattan Furniture Shop asked me recently if I would help them with this survey they're currently running and one of the questions asked was what helps you to unwind when you're feeling stressed with one of the options to select from being cleaning the house and keeping a tidy home. I always think a tidy home equals a tidy and therefore calmer mind. Though with two small children this is so not always possible, so I usually just give one room a quick tidy and wipe-around and feel better for it.
6. Remembering what's actually important and not over stressing about the little things!
Sometimes I think it's too easy for me to get caught up on how high the washing is stacking up or how desperate the stairs are in need of a hoover, but then I try to stop myself, take a huge step back and ask myself.. will it matter in a years time? And so it worth getting stressed out about? It helps me restore balance in my head and realize that an over-spilling washing basket as over-spilling as it is, isn't the end of the world.
7. Getting a break from the house and a little fresh-air
The amount of times I've felt worked up/overwhelmed or stressed out and then have gone out for a walk, even to the park with the kids and have come home feeling SO much better is countless. Fresh air does something to me and gives me perspective as well as inspiration.
8. Laughing and finding the funny side in things
Sometimes we all just need a bit of a giggle. When I'm feeling stressed, laughing usually isn't at the top of my agenda, but actually it's always what I need! I could find something that the kids are doing funny or I might start watching a funny cat video on the Internet (THIS makes me laugh every single time!). Finding something funny instantly helps me to stop feeling so tense and start to relax. The other day Logan knocked our pasta sauce that we were about to eat on to the floor, it splatted all over Adam's socks and his jeans, I could have felt stressed that we had ended up with far less sauce, but I saw the funny side in Adam's jeans being covered in pasta sauce splat. I always think there's no point in crying over spilt milk.. (or pasta sauce!).
9. Grabbing an alone moment when I can
As an introvert alone time is essential for me! It's not always easy to get alone time as a parent, but when my Hubby is around and I'm feeling a bit all caught up, I make sure I grab a five minute break and have some time alone if I feel I need it. I might read a few pages of my mindfulness book or even hang the washing, just catching that time alone sometimes every now and again really helps.
10. Having a cuddle
I'm a cuddly person anyway, but this is something that always helps me to relax and see straight. If I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed I'll grab a cuddle on the sofa off of Adam if he's about or one of the boys (usually Ethan, as Logan never sits still long enough anymore). And failing that, I'll find myself a cat to cuddle (Charlie is always up for a snuggle on the sofa). It's just nice to take that time in the day to stop and just sit and focus on a nice big hug. I especially love it when Ethan gets in from pre-school, he's usually knackered and so just sits all chilled out on me and tells me about his day, it's lovely!
So those are 10 ways I like to unwind in 10 minutes or less. I'm not always great at it, but I try and remember to do these things when I can everyday as it's so important that us Mums look after ourselves if we want to be the best at looking after our little people. Is there anything that you'd add to this list?
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