Hey friends...I have just spent the day working on a workbook that is available to all my clients and it deals with exploring your self-esteem.
What is self-esteem?
Self-esteem reflects a person's overall subjective emotional evaluation of his or her own worth...so as my husband was looking over my shoulder, he asked me about the word "worthiness" and said don't you mean "worthlessness"? Ack! No. I certainly did not. I meant worthiness. I was developing a way to reflect on our feelings and where they might stem from. Nearly everyone experiences fluctuations in their self-esteem and the way they feel about themselves or how they look, but sometimes it can be hard to see the world and your place in it through a positive reflection instead of these negative thoughts that take up too much space in your head. So tonight, I wanted to share with you three ways you can boost your self-esteem.
3 Ways to boost your self-esteem
- The JOY list. Make a list of all the places, people and things that give you joy. If you have a favorite outfit that gives you a boost write that down. If there is an activity that lights you up like painting, drawing or yoga, write that as well. On days you are having a hard time, refer to your JOY list. That's right. If you think a day is going to be particularly stressful, oh I don't know like a review at work day, wear your favorite outfit. Just feeling better will raise your vibration as you go into the meeting. This truly helps others around you take notice of the energy you are putting out there.
- Replace negative with positive. I know you think this is easier said than done because I hear that excuse all the time, but the truth is, it is easy. Pay attention to your self talk and think about how you would want your children to talk to themselves. Negative begets negative. Take those unfounded negative thoughts and start to make a note on how what you are thinking is untrue. Maybe a friend said that they needed to lose weight that day at lunch and it got you thinking about that. They keep talking about it all the time, and you just start to feel the same way. Recognize that that's their shit. <<< yes, I said shit, but it's true. It's theirs and they need to own that. Start re-framing your thoughts and perhaps help your friend to do the same if you would like. It's not your burden...it's theirs. And the truth is, if someone else repeatedly expects you to carry their burden, it can be a negative feeling.
- Self-care routines need to be in place. This is essential. I was working with a client and I asked her about the last time she took a bath. I know that sounds like a routine question, but it isn't. She said "A bath?? The kids take baths. I don't have time." <<< BINGO. You do have time. Let me come over and pull a Moonstruck on you...okay, I won't (for those too young to get the reference, she slaps her boyfriend and says snap out of it.). I changed my entire way of thinking about self-care in the last two years and I want you to understand how critical it is. Self-care practices are all those activities that we engage in to improve our overall sense of wellbeing. Self-care strategies work toward improving the many aspects that make up who we are, including our physical, relational, mental, spiritual, and emotional health...now imagine you don't have these in place. Exercise, sleep, hot baths and journaling are just a few of the things I talk about with clients. I could write a book on this alone...but that's for later. For tonight, just remember, you are responsible for the energy you bring to the table my friends. Take care of you.
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