Recently I was told that I think my life is worse than others. I don’t, but there are things going on in my life that are exceptionally difficult. Daily dealing with a person who is dying is hard, especially when it’s a parent. Death is a part of life and, I’d hope, every adult knows this. When my father died, it was instant. A massive heart attack and he was gone. This is much different. dementia and Parkinson’s is a hellish thing that no one should have to go through. I’m not sure what is worse…living with these afflictions or watching them play out daily. Some days you just wish it would end and one day it will. Then what?
Mom and I have had some good talks and the other day I said that, in the end, there will so many emotions. Relief that it’s over, guilt for feeing the relief, sorrow….you get my point.
So much is up in the air. The only thing that is sure is that God is in control and everything happens in his time.