Am I a Horrible Person for Finding Beauty in Boston?

Posted on the 29 April 2013 by Elena @croppedstories

I was in Boston on Saturday for a hair appointment.  It's not often I get into the city so it's easy to forget how beautiful it can be especially on a warm and sunny Spring day!  For the first time since last year, I got to sport my open toe sandals and pretty pedicured toes!  It was a good day.  A much needed "ME" day and I looked forward to the next two hours I would have to relax in a chair and have someone make me pretty!  With that said, I walked the streets of Boston with a smile on my face.  That is of course, until I got to Boylston Street.

I couldn't help thinking about the ones that were hurt or worse lost their life from the Marathon bombings!  It made me angry and all of a sudden this wave of guilt consumed me.  I felt guilty for finding beauty in a city where such horrific events had occurred.  It was a horrible sick feeling that had me questioning life and asking "Why"?  Why them and not me?  Why them and not you, him, her, or me?  Who decides that?

While I was cuddling with my little one on the couch and you were food shopping, others were in distress, being hurt or killed.  While I was having my afternoon tea and you were celebrating a wedding anniversary, others were in distress, being hurt or killed.  While I was sharing a laugh with my husband and you were drafting your next blog post, others were in distress, being hurt or killed.  Sometimes it's easy to forget about the life that goes on outside your own family or circle of friends until something tragic like this happens!  Oh yeah, that's right.  There IS life outside of my house, my street, my state.  

Every night I've been praying.  I ask for many things.  The most important, right up there with being healthy, is to be safe.  To keep EVERYONE safe!  Everyone including YOU reading this post.  This is my contribution to society.  My prayers.  When I have no control  it just makes sense to put my faith in something or someone larger than myself, larger than all of us!  I HAVE to believe there is a higher power watching over us.  It helps me sleep at night.  It gets me through.  It keeps me going.  I can only hope that those who were affected have coping strategies.  Something needs to work for them.  To get them through.  To keep them going.  

I'll pray on this.

Too deep for a Monday?  Not to worry, I promise to have fun stuff this week too!

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