Diaries Magazine

And Then We Have…the Dumbass Move.

Posted on the 23 February 2013 by Redneckprincess @RdNeckPrincess

Back side of the mountain

Have you ever woke up in the morning, gone to the bathroom to pee, stubbed your toe…stepped on the cat and somehow managed to wake up dreaming about work all in the same breath?

I mean yes…I pee while sleeping apparently. In the bathroom, but I don’t actually wake up. Is there such a thing as sleep peeing?

Gah…that is so obnoxious. Hahahahah…

So in my mission to post three days in a row at least, this is what I created today.

It started out harsh, as you can tell by the above sleep peeing.

If you have ever been attracted to me, I am sorry to have just blown that to absolute smithereens…but hey, it’s what I do.

It really only gets worse from there…

Breakfast was uneventful, as was Walmart and The Salvation Army.

I bought two new CD’s. Good thing.

I was a klutz all day. To the point where Bruce questioned walking beside me at one point.

Whatever, safety boy…

He then took these amazing Elk pictures…I missed it, cause I can’t see that far…really.

Elk ass

And this one…close up. Yes.

Elk gone

And then…I pull the ultimate dumbass move. I hadn’t had anything to drink yet.

Really.

We are moving along looking for wood. I am walking with the camera, spotting for wood and looking for pictures.

I find this weeny as piece of wood, and throw it in the truck as Bruce is driving by me.

I am not a good shot.

Or I am an amazing shot. Whichever. I mean what are the chances that I would throw this pussy assed little tiny piece of wood…miss the actual 2 x 6 hole and do this to the back window?

Broken window

Well chances are huge. And yes I did.

Awesome.

I am never. going. to. live. it. down.

EVER.

It is sad no one took a picture of the look on my face. You would have seen dumbassery at it’s finest.

That second when the log leaves your hand and you are like, holy fuck…that is totally going to smash the window into about six million pieces and then you are going to have a broken truck window kinda throw. I rock that shit.

I mean we got a shitload of wood.

wood and broken window

Even with a broken window. At this point it was in spite of the broken window. I totally felt the need to make up for the fact that I am a raging bad freaking throw. The fact that I was almost sober didn’t help either.

And my logger…kept sidetracking me. Cause damn. He is cute.

My sexy logger

This was totally before I blew his window into a kazillion pieces.

I did the good karma thing, and picked up a bit of garbage that was laying around, Bruce followed suit and found a full oil container, that we can use for the  chainsaw. Looking after the Earth is awesome. So is Karma….

shotgun shell

Shotgun shells and Tim Horton’s cups are everywhere, I just wish people would freaking clean up after themselves…seriously. Because otherwise, we could send you to the moon. I mean look at it. It’s clean right? We need to learn from that. Take your damn garbage home with you when you go in the bush. It’s not brain surgery, really. It’s not.

The Moon

And that’s all I have for now. It was in actuality the most awesome day ever. We had fun. We laughed. We remembered why we love to be together and how awesome we are as a couple.

That’s huge.

I love it.

I am happy.

Thank you Universe. For the great day. For the reminder. For the fun.

I needed that . xox0

Happy Saturday everyone!

Back side of the mountain

Have you ever woke up in the morning, gone to the bathroom to pee, stubbed your toe…stepped on the cat and somehow managed to wake up dreaming about work all in the same breath?

I mean yes…I pee while sleeping apparently. In the bathroom, but I don’t actually wake up. Is there such a thing as sleep peeing?

Gah…that is so obnoxious. Hahahahah…

So in my mission to post three days in a row at least, this is what I created today.

It started out harsh, as you can tell by the above sleep peeing.

If you have ever been attracted to me, I am sorry to have just blown that to absolute smithereens…but hey, it’s what I do.

It really only gets worse from there…

Breakfast was uneventful, as was Walmart and The Salvation Army.

I bought two new CD’s. Good thing.

I was a klutz all day. To the point where Bruce questioned walking beside me at one point.

Whatever, safety boy…

He then took these amazing Elk pictures…I missed it, cause I can’t see that far…really.

Elk ass

And this one…close up. Yes.

Elk gone

And then…I pull the ultimate dumbass move. I hadn’t had anything to drink yet.

Really.

We are moving along looking for wood. I am walking with the camera, spotting for wood and looking for pictures.

I find this weeny as piece of wood, and throw it in the truck as Bruce is driving by me.

I am not a good shot.

Or I am an amazing shot. Whichever. I mean what are the chances that I would throw this pussy assed little tiny piece of wood…miss the actual 2 x 6 hole and do this to the back window?

Broken window

Well chances are huge. And yes I did.

Awesome.

I am never. going. to. live. it. down.

EVER.

It is sad no one took a picture of the look on my face. You would have seen dumbassery at it’s finest.

That second when the log leaves your hand and you are like, holy fuck…that is totally going to smash the window into about six million pieces and then you are going to have a broken truck window kinda throw. I rock that shit.

I mean we got a shitload of wood.

wood and broken window

Even with a broken window. At this point it was in spite of the broken window. I totally felt the need to make up for the fact that I am a raging bad freaking throw. The fact that I was almost sober didn’t help either.

And my logger…kept sidetracking me. Cause damn. He is cute.

My sexy logger

This was totally before I blew his window into a kazillion pieces.

I did the good karma thing, and picked up a bit of garbage that was laying around, Bruce followed suit and found a full oil container, that we can use for the  chainsaw. Looking after the Earth is awesome. So is Karma….

shotgun shell

Shotgun shells and Tim Horton’s cups are everywhere, I just wish people would freaking clean up after themselves…seriously. Because otherwise, we could send you to the moon. I mean look at it. It’s clean right? We need to learn from that. Take your damn garbage home with you when you go in the bush. It’s not brain surgery, really. It’s not.

The Moon

And that’s all I have for now. It was in actuality the most awesome day ever. We had fun. We laughed. We remembered why we love to be together and how awesome we are as a couple.

That’s huge.

I love it.

I am happy.

Thank you Universe. For the great day. For the reminder. For the fun.

I needed that . xox0

Happy Saturday everyone!


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