Hello lovelies!So tomorrow is my birthday, I can't quite believe I'm turning 23. Where has the time gone?
I'm normally pretty excited about my birthdays, like a child on Christmas day, but this year I find myself feeling indifferent this year. I hope I do get out of this little funk I'm in right now because I do have plans for my birthday and the following weeks after. It's a mix of two things, one is timing. I feel this year has flew over ridiculously faster than most years. I graduated last year and thought that that year would fly over but it didn't but for some reason this year has zoomed by and I've barely had time to just sit and mull things over and plan things well in advance like I usually do. The last thing is loss. Earlier this year my granddad passed away and he was a large part of my life. He used to live with us so I used to see him everyday and although I feel I have come to terms with his passing a lot more than I had months ago, I was warned that 'the first year is always the hardest/you'll go through a lot of 'firsts' which is true. This is my first birthday without him and as my birthday has got closer and closer, it has also reminded me of that more and more. Also I know that after my birthday, these 'firsts' will continue. His birthday is in september and then my mam's birthday without her dad and then Christmas and then the anniversary of his death (which is so morbid to even think about).It is really overwhelming in all honesty. If you hadn't guessed already, I'm a worrier and I think about things ALOT but it's just the way I process things I suppose. To be honest I have no idea why I have decided to pour all that out in a blog post but maybe it's my way of processing what is going on by putting it out there. I don't want to feel this wash of sadness on what is supposed to be a happy occasion but I know it is better to get it all out today rather than tomorrow.
On a positive note I was surprised by my Mam earlier with a slice of red velvet cake that she picked up from Caffe Nero in the town (my favourite!) as an early birthday treat haha how cute is she please?! She's always really thoughtful like that :) I also do have some nice plans tomorrow with my boyfriend. Just keeping it low key this year and going to the Botanist in Newcastle for a change. I'd been to the one in Leeds and thought it was amazing so looking forward to trying the Newcastle one. Then off to see Inside Out finally! I've been wanting to see it for ages but life got completely in the way so looking forward to seeing that film. If you have seen it, I'd love to know your thoughts on it. My friend went to see it and was raving about the Volcano/Lava short at the beginning haha! I went for a lovely meal with my Mam and Dad on Wednesday as a pre-birthday thing. Although we live together, we're always doing different things and work different times so it was great to be able to sit down the 3 of us and spend some quality time together. I also have plans with my friends from work, another meal and then going out and then the following week going for some delicious cocktails with my friends out of work from school so the next few weeks will be sociable ones :)
Also I have a few posts in the pipeline, I have photos from my holiday in the summer and another Tsum tsum collection to show you all, as well as a few other things too which I will eventually get around too. In the meantime you can follow me on Instagram: vasey228 or Twitter: _violetdaffodil if you'd like as I tend to post more frequently on those. Have a great day and thanks for reading! <3
