Ch6 - Don't Say the j Word

“Ya Allah, please watch over us.” Farrah whispered into the darkness.Nada lay still, listening to her mom recite versus from the Holy Quran. The events of yesterday still lingered in her mind and she was too frightened to go to sleep. Her mother ended the prayer and flicked on a small table lamp sending tall shadows shooting up the wall. “Good night Nada,” she said before pulling the duvet up around her ears.“Night Mama,” her voice was barely above a whisper.Nada’s eyes ached from the lack of sleep, even now she struggled to keep them open. She was too scared to let go, to become vulnerable to him, to risk any further chances of seeing or feeling the presence around her.I’ll stay awake until Fajr, just until the Sun comes up, only a few more hours and then he won’t bother me. Nada hugged her second pillow to her chest, using it as a barrier to protect herself. She focused her gaze on the small glaring bulb looking to it for some sort of warmth and security.Soft words popped into her subconscious, and soon Nada found herself recalling an old hymn from her primary school days that had long been forgotten. This little light of mine…I’m gonna let it shine… The words tumbled around her head and she blinked surprised that she remembered the song at such a traumatic time in her life. This little light of mine…I’m gonna let it shine…let it shine! Let it shine…she continued the hymn on loop for a few more minutes until her eyelids felt heavy and she knew she could fight sleep no longer. It must have been a few minutes or even a few hours when her eyes jerked open. “Nada!” There it was, she knew she heard it. He was calling her again, she heard him a few times when she was somewhere far away, in deep sleep, dreaming of a safe place where nothing evil could reach her.“Nada…” his voice trailed off smirking somewhere nearby.Nada blinked rapidly. The room was dark, where had that little lamp gone? Shadows blended into each other as her eyes struggled to focus. Suddenly her eyes widened as she felt icy cold tendrils snake its way over her bare feet, clamping down tightly on each of her ankles. Nada kicked at the clamps, but her feet were locked onto the bed. She opened her mouth to scream, yet nothing came out except a low murmur, she tried again but her lips refused to follow orders firmly sealing themselves together.A sob escaped her and immediately choked off as she felt forceful weights encircle her wrists pulling them free from around her pillow and securing them beside her stiff body. Nada fought hard, failing to resist the crushing force from placing her body in a cramped star formation, her eyes were frozen wide, they had fully adjusted to the darkness and now she saw a darker inky black shadow hover just above her.Her limbs were locked onto the bed exposing her body to the ominous presence that lurked over her. Hot tears began to slide down her cheeks and in an instant a swift roughness passed over her cheeks wiping them away. Terror coursed through every vein, Nada was well aware that something had just wiped her tears away, something with many hands that had a hold of her paralyzed body.Seconds later, she felt the duvet inch lower and lower until the cold settled somewhere on her chest. Peeking down Nada cried out in anguish, her heart lurched towards her toes as she realized she was naked, her nightshirt and bra had been removed and she was positive she hadn’t done it as she never slept without adequate support. Nada could hear the blood gushing through her, she had never felt so weak, so incapable and humiliated as she felt at that moment. Anger entwined itself to the other emotions, pumping adrenaline through her frozen body which helped her to think properly. She had to wake up her mum, she threw all her energy into her chest and hauled her torso up and then back down again, she kept going until she could feel the bed shaking underneath her.“Hmm,” Farrah mumbled still asleep beside her.“Mmm! Mmmm!” Nada silently screamed jerking her body violently.“What? Nada go to sleep.” Farrah sighed blissfully unaware of the torment being played out just inches away. A low giggle sounded in Nada’s ear and she felt something soft brush against her lobe, tugging at it playfully. Strong hands pushed her shoulders down and secured Nada into place making any further movement impossible. This is it, her eyes closed bracing her body for the pain that was about to be brought down onto her. Nada clenched her pelvis preparing for the violent intrusion that she was sure was about to take place, she was a virgin and she had heard plenty stories of how painful the first time could be, she knew rape was a thousand times more painful and she prayed she would live through it. Her subconscious began screaming out the prayer used for all purposes, she was grateful her mom had forced her to learn it off by heart. Her eyes squeezed tighter as she felt a wetness travel down her neck and trail down to her exposed breasts, she shuddered at the thought of the invisible tongue and almost gagged into her closed mouth.Her breasts tingled and she felt her body tighten as soft kisses were rained across her chest and down the center of her stomach. She had finished reciting the prayer and had started again trying to block out the brutal attack on her over-sensitive skin.Beep. Beep. Beep. The shrill sound of the alarm clock buzzed loudly jerking the roving tongue off her skin. Farrah groaned and inhaled sharply as she began to stretch. In an instant the heaviness lifted from Nada’s limbs and her lips parted releasing a scream as loud as ten alarm clocks going off simultaneously.Farrah fell from the bed and stumbled blindly, a few seconds later the overhead lights went on and Farrah stood squinting at her daughter. Nada continued to scream, her eyes closed with exertion. “Nada!” Farrah ran over to her and grabbed her shoulders shaking her awake.Nada’s eyes flew open and her scream was cut short by Farrah’s hand clamping down across it.“You were dreaming! Wake up!” Farrah shouted.Nada sat up panting heavily. “No, no, no no no!” She cried wiping at her face, her shoulders and her breasts.“What happened? Where are your clothes?” Farrah looked around confused.“Mum,” Nada’s eyes met her mum’s frightened ones. “Where are yours?”“What?” Farrah looked down at her own naked body. “He did this. He was here,” Nada gasped rubbing her wrists.“What happened Nada?” Farrah clenched her daughter’s red wrists, “what are these?” “He held me down, he tried to…to…” Nada couldn’t complete her sentence and broke down crying.Farrah wrapped the duvet around Nada’s bruised body and got up to get dressed herself. Her face was somber as she switched off the alarm clock. “Nada, why didn’t I feel him taking my clothes off?” “I don’t know, I didn’t feel it either. I only woke up when he grabbed me.” “Oh you poor child! Come on, we need to pray, it’s Fajr, time for the first prayer.”Nada nodded and stood up on shaky legs. They prayed side by side and Nada felt marginally better, maybe I should try to pray five times a day. She folded up her prayer mat and sat back thinking hard about her faith. Maybe I am being punished, maybe I did something bad and now I’m paying the price. “Mum, I don’t think we’re safe here anymore. Both of us had our tops removed without even knowing it. If the alarm clock didn’t go off, he would have raped me,” Nada’s voice broke.“Ssh. I know. This can’t go on, I’m going to call Pakistan today and see what the Imam suggests. In the meantime, I have a plan. Get dressed, we’re going out.”  Ten minutes later the pair came downstairs and froze at the bottom of the stairs. Lying in the hallway was a pair of jeans and a jumper that Nada recognized as her own, the ones that went missing when her cousins left. Only these garments were shredded, as if long claws had raked through them sending both mother and daughter a clear message of who was behind the summoning of the evil visiting their house.