It isn’t only macho men who deny their failing bodies, preferring to risk falling than to be safe, to tough it out rather than admit a weakness. I have found myself doing the same thing.
When my blood pressure was fluctuating up and down with new medication, I started experiencing dizzy spells on hikes with my friend Ginny. She likes to include steep hills in her walks, saying she just doesn’t feel she’s had a good walk without them.
I used to be fine with that, especially since Ginny slowed down going uphill, just like me. We are the same age and our fitness levels seemed to match perfectly.
Ginny confided that she’d dumped other hiking friends who got too slow because of disabilities. I knew I had to measure up if I wanted to keep her as a walking partner.
And I did. But after Ginny was going to Zumba classes for about six months, her uphill walking speed started to match her downhill speed. I had to push myself to keep up.
Then I went on a new blood pressure medication and found myself suddenly dizzy. I’d stop in the middle of our hike and tell Ginny to wait.
In a minute or two I’d feel OK and we went on. Ginny gave me a lot of slack at that time because Adrian had just died. Maybe my dizziness was an emotional reaction, not a physical one.
Then one day after Ginny and I got back from an especially vigorous hike, I felt suddenly strange when I stood up as I got out of her car. My vision was blurry. I tried holding my hand over one eye, then the other, to see if there was a difference. Ginny was walking ahead of me up the walkway, so she didn’t notice.
Ginny had a long career as a nurse, so she might have been a good person to ask about the strange change in my vision. But I just waved good-bye to her and continued on to my own house up the road.
When I got home, I checked my blood pressure. It was extremely low for me, and I became frightened. I drank a lot of water, lay down for a while, and then looked up my symptoms on the Internet. Yes, blurry vision was a possible symptom of low blood pressure.
What would we do without the Internet to check out our new aches and pains, review our symptoms, and find out what side effects other people have experienced with a medication we’re taking?
On occasion I felt dizzy when walking with other friends, too, but I never said anything. I was always happy when the other person needed to slow down or take a rest. If I had to, I tried to disguise my need as a water break, or “Wow, what a view.”
My daughter was concerned. “What if you fall down when you get dizzy, and hurt yourself?”
She thought I should skip those uphill walks rather than take a chance. I thought I should figure out how to get in better shape so I could keep up with Ginny.
#
A change in medication has mostly solved my low blood-pressure problems. And Ginny charitably lets me take the lead on trails now so I can “set the pace.”
But I know how fast she likes to walk and I try to maintain that speed.
Just call me “Macho Grandma.”