For those of you who are unfamiliar with me, I'm DriveThruGuy and I run a blog called Life In The Drive Thru where I share stories about my daily trials in the drive thru. There are a couple of things you should know about that last sentence...
1. run a blog = rant
and
2. trials in the drive thru = about customers
A link for Blogapalooza 2012 brought me to this site. Seems like a great site thus far, so on with the story...
We have this regular customer in the drive thru, who I'll call Dorothy. I generally call her B!tch in my head when I see her approaching the window, but that's more of a pet name I have for her. She looks like a Dorothy to me, and yes, I have names for multiple regulars.
Anyway, Dorothy seems like a drive thru virgin EVERYTIME she pulls up to place an order. I swear, she asks the same questions all the time, it's like a routine with her. She either thinks we lie to her constantly or the movie 50 First Dates was based on her.
"Hi, can I take your order?"
"Just a minute please" is her daily response. You're here all the time lady, how do you not know what you want? Also, if you don't know what you want, WHY DID YOU PULL UP TO THE SPEAKER? The drive thru is about speed and efficiency. A few seconds pass and then she'll place her order, a task at which she is surprisingly competent considering her other shortcomings.
"Do you have nutrition guides?"
"Pardon me?" I heard her but it's like a little game!
"Nutrition guide, so I can see nutritional facts on your food" I have news for you, IT'S NOT GOOD FOR YOU LADY.
"No, unfortunately we don't, sorry."
Then she'll pull up to the window and I'll hand her the bag "Here you are, have a nice day." Before I can get the window closed and escape...
"Can I have vinegar?"
"Sure" I say. I go get her some vinegar packs and bring them back, "Here you go."
At which point she hits me with "Can I have some extra napkins?"
"Sure" I respond. The napkins are next to the vinegar, too bad she couldn't have asked for them at the same time.
I bring her the napkins, "Here you go!"
"And is there ketchup in the bag?" Why the holy hell would there be ketchup in the bag? You didn't ask for ketchup, so NO, THERE'S NO F'N KETCHUP IN THE BAG. Maybe next time I'll fill a vinyl glove with diced tomatoes and old cigarette butts from the parking lot and stick it in the bag, so in case you ask for it, it'll already be there!
"No, but I'll get you some." This is the daily routine between Dorothy and I. She sends me on repeated trips to get her various condiments until I want to scratch my own eyes out so I can leave to go to the hospital. Everyday she send me for these 3 items. I have them ready now when I know it's her.
Today however, she took it to a new level. "How many ketchup packets did you give me?"
"Three" I resposnded.
"Oh, that's not enough, I need three more!" I have to go get her the extra 3 ketchup packets. WTF? Is 6 the new number of ketchup packets required for an order of french fries? And why didn't I get the memo if that's the case? I've been giving he 3 ketchup packs a day for as long as I can remember. This lady is either crazy, off her meds or has gotten her hands on a nutritional guide that says ketchup is awesome. I guess that's just Life In The Drive Thru!
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DriveThruGuy