In a perfect world, where money is no object and there are 48 hours in a day, this is what I would be looking forward to right now:
UAE:
MMI's the Cellar, Al Hamra. Get a freebie brunch at Spectrum on One (yes, it's a good one - one of the best in Dubai) buy buying my wine at The Cellar. Sure, you have to spend 3500AED, but the brunch is worth a third of that, you save the money on tax, you get to go to RAK, and seriously, don't pretend you're not going to drink that much in two months or less anyway...
23 May -1 June
Jumeirah Restaurant Week. This is your chance to grab a three-course meal for 180AED at the most expensive venues or 120 at the more casual. My picks - for 180 AED Pier Chic, La Parilla, Vu's, Voi and Blue Flame or for 120, thy Al Hambra, Der Keller, Tokyo @ the Towers, Al Nafoora (Zabeel Saray) or Plaj. Book ASAP - it gets busy.
23-25 May
Pe単a de la Independencia Argentina. I thought this was supposed to be July 9, but it seems there's a bit on this weekend, so I might need to perform some Googling. There are a couple of goings-on. Firstly, you can dine at Asado on Saturday night - heaps of fantastic food (it's one of my favorite restaurants in Dubai), live Pe単a music, and traditional Argentinean dancers 295AED, 100 for kids. Secondly, you might want to head out to Meydan for the Fifth Dubai Tango Festival. Either watch or learn, and top it off with a gala dinner on the 24th in the Sky Bubble (you know that huge crescent shape on top of the grandstand).
Every weekend
Skip the boozy brunch, and head to Shang Palace for unlimited yum cha for 115AED. I think this sounds ridiculously cheap, but there it is. They obviously don't know how many dumplings I can down in a single sitting. They are licensed, so if you don't want to skip the vino altogether, you can still get a bit silly. Shangri La, Sheikh Zayed Rd.
The rest of the world:
Sunsplash. This festival could just make me cool again. There's some serious modern music makers with an indie theme. Style is the order of the day - only 400 of the most discerning travellers on the planet will make it in. Raw food and yoga to accompany your vodka and red bull
Lisbon, Portugal, June 12-14
Feast of St Anthony. Head to the Avenida da Liberdade for the procession, then up winding hilly lanes of Mouraria or Alfama. Grab your piece of St Anthony's Bread, but don't eat it - instead, take it to the nearest church, scribble down a prayer, and put it with all the others. There's plenty to eat though, as long as you like sardines. Stay out of the expensive restaurants, and get them from somewhere where you can sit on a plastic stool and watch the activity. Eat them simply grilled with lots of lemon (and chase the kids around with their skeletons when you're finished.). Ooh - and expect to see lots of brides, and if someone gives you a pot of basil, that means you're next. Lovely blog post to get you in the mood here.
Barcelona, Spain, June 23-24
The Festival of St Joan. Summer solstice mayhem, with fires, fireworks, herbs and feasting - in the streets, hanging over balconies and on Barceloneta beach. Food of choice is 'coques' - kind of like pizza, but not. Can be sweet or savoury. I like the sound of the one with pork crackling.
Bali, Indonesia, June 25-30
BBC Good Food ME is hosting a culinary trip to Bali. All done for you, no organising, leave the family behind, jump on a plane and be with like-minded food-obsessive people. Need I say more?
London, England - July 5-7
Food Blogger Connect. I really should be making this, but you know what they say about best laid plans. It appears London will have to wait for me until after summer. But you might still make it. Get blogging tips from the likes of David Lebovitz and Jaden Hair, learn how to set up your own supper club, or even how to write a cook book. Make lots of food blogging friends, and eat yourself silly.