Early One Morning

Posted on the 11 April 2013 by Ravenswingthog @ravenswingthog
Thankfully, because I'm quite tired (busy at work) today my dad has stepped up and delivering a cracking guest blog post - enjoy!
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Early One Morning.
Listen …. Time passes ….. ever so quietly. Sleepy souls slumber almost silently, unaware of times quiet, steady tread. Soft embracing shadows lull errant thoughts of wakefulness into silence. Morning arrives with no ado about anything, no alarm calls, no birdsong, no sunrise beckoning the sleepers away from their comforting cuddly bed. For a timeless long while sweet darkness holds all safe in it’s arms.
An idle thoughts wafts murmuring through one sleep befuddled brain …. I wonder?
Barely focussed eyes glace at the clock – 5:10 am … time to get up!
Another, more vigorous soul nearby me sits upright and in yawning fits and starts, gathers itself and miraculously stands, and then makes its way downstairs. Why must she dash about so, it’s still the middle of the night! The sleepy soul still abed closes its eyes ever so briefly, soon, soon it too will also have to rise and greet the day.
All is quiet, then the dogs make excited noises as their mistress half stumbles through the kitchen gloom, gathers a kaftan and a handful of dog biccies for eager canines. My word they are excited, yips and woofs abound, you’d think they’d never been fed before. Goodness me hounds, what a noise  - “EERRRGGHHHHH!”
Thinks are thought in the embracing darkness …. That, that almost sounded like Christine …..
……… (bare seconds pass.. and with a note of urgency now …
“Erm ……”
“GRAHAM!!!!! I’VE TRODDEN IN SOMETHING!!!”
I rise and struggle to throw off the befuddled charms of sleep
Christine sits on the kitchen stool mentally screaming for someone to cut her right foot off asap…
With astounding talent my better half had managed to walk through the kitchen in complete darkness and complete safety, only then to put the light on and stand in erm … (readers of a sensitive disposition look away now).
Christine has a minor flaw in her character, she cannot handle vomit. No way, don’t even think about it. The possible options are –
1)   There is no such thing as vomit, it doesn’t exist. 2)   If it does exist anywhere close by, she will join in and add to it.
I cleaned her right foot, thereby gaining extra brownie points all day long. I strongly suspect China – the larger of two, very fluffy Rough Collies we live with. She habitually eats anything she can find with little regard as to whether it is food or not and had decided that a snack of dog grass was required to settle her belly. Sleep had most definitely ended!