Electrical Appliances (Warning: Harsh Language!)

Posted on the 07 February 2016 by Ravenswingthog @ravenswingthog
Be warned, this post does have a modicum of bad language.  Some people say that if you're truly funny, you don't need to swear.  If you agree, you might want to skip this post - maybe you'll like the yoga one though!

I've been thinking, on and off, about how it's funny that certain electrical appliances we "trust" more than others.


For example - when you go out of the house for a day, there are some appliances that you're happy to leave running, and others you're not. I've done my best to categorise them into trusted, somewhat trusted, and untrusted - see if you agree with my categories:
Fridges / Freezers - TRUSTED. Fridges are absolutely salt of the earth, we don't understand how they work but we're happy to travel around the world and leave it running.

Mobile phone chargers - TRUSTED. Despite the fact that you're probably using a cheap knockoff charger off a market or from some sort of cut-price shop, because you don't want to take out a second mortgage to buy a charger made by the company that made your phone, you're happy leaving these things run at full pelt while you sleep.
Computers - SOMEWHAT TRUSTED. Computers aren't really trusted (being hot running machines with fans that suck in inflammable dust and scatter it liberally on hot internal components) but you'll leave them on if:
  1. You're running an anti-virus scan and need to go out shopping
  2. You're halfway through Call of Duty and really really REALLY need a pizza (so bad you can't wait for delivery)
  3. You hate having to wait twenty minutes for it to boot up when you turn it on
Sky box aka DVR (Digital Video Recorder) - TRUSTED. Despite having the same attributes as a computer (it's a hot box probably full of dust), you trust this enough to leave it on indefinitely, because heaven forbid you miss season three episode sixteen of CSI: Honolulu, or wherever the latest spinoff is based.
Lights - SOMEWHAT TRUSTED. You're happy for lights to be on in the house, even in rooms that you are not, but you probably turn them off when you leave the house. Except you may keep one on, so it "looks as though someone is in". So you trust that one. But none of the other buggers.
Tumble driers - UNTRUSTED. Everyone knows that tumble driers are untrustworthy bastards which are liable to catch fire the moment we step outside. We don't even like them running when we're in the house.
Washing machines - TRUSTED. somehow trusted more than driers, even though they consist of the well known magical triad of electricity, water, and heating elements.
Televisions - SOMEWHAT TRUSTED. We trust TVs on the whole, but if going away you unplug it, just in case it decides to turn itself on and burst into flames. Plus that little red standby light is really annoying.
Toaster - EVIL BLOODY UNTRUSTED DEVICE!!! Toasters are the most evil of all electrical appliances, because time and again we are convinced "this time, THIS TIME - this time, we won't burn the toast, we will set the toaster so it comes out crispy but not burned."
And we fail. Because at some point, we'll turn our back on the toaster, and the toaster furiously burns the toast as fast as it can to send out smoke, to wake up the bloody smoke alarm again.
Are there any appliances that I've missed, or do you disagree/agree with my views? Well, you know where the comments box is :)