Forget my husband, SAVE MY LEHENGA!
Since the month of February, I have been going too numerous marriages. Moreover, after enjoying the laughs, the pictures, and some delicious and some not diarrhoea causing food, I realised something: When a girl is getting married, or going to her best friend’s marriage, she does not care about anything other than her dresses and jewellery. And I have two stories to prove my point.My first story begins with a phone call, not of the bride but of her best friend. Sitting in my room, staring at a black screen for an hour, I had a sudden realisation that my brain was stuck with writers’ block disease. This virus though seems harmless at first, but it slowly eats away the confidence of a young writer. In my mind, I knew how I wanted my story to pan out; however, I was not able to get the words to flow through my fingers. Exhausted with working hard at not writing, I started watching the new episode of Walking dead when I heard the sound of my cell phone ringing. I looked everywhere on my bed, but I could not find it. Then I remembered that I hid it under the pillow, so the notification messages would not disturb me, and yes, I could have put it in silence mode, but I just did not, so do not argue. ‘Hello. . . Arjuun, suno na. . . please Yaar mere sath market tak chalo,’ said my friend. Let us call her Rachel from series Friends. Maybe I just wanted to get out of the house or her over polite voice asking me in the sweetest of ways, but I was getting ready to pick her up. I quickly brushed the thick mop of hair on my head, and got into my jeans and T-shirt and headed to her house. I reached there, and called her. ‘I am coming,’ she said and it took her 10 minutes to lock up her home and come down 20 flights of stairs. This is what I do not get; why do women make us wait so much? Soon after a wait of 10 minutes, where I cooked up theories why she was late, we headed off to the market. During the ride over, she told me she has to get her lehenga altered before 24th February (only three days left), and the way she said it I could see the urgency. I felt that lehenga was not just a piece of clothing, but also the very thing that could save humanity by the way she explained the importance of its alteration. Furthermore, she added that all boutiques are worthless as they charge too much, plus they take too much time, and often they do not do their jobs properly. And while I was listening to her, I was wondering, how someone can be so passionate about a dress and not mention anything about the bride, groom or where the wedding was, and why are the people who run boutiques so evil. #$#$#$#$#$#Well, my second adventure started as I went over to meet my very old friend, let us call her Monica, also from series Friends. As I was sitting at her house, she excitedly told me all the shopping she had done in the past few weeks. I felt fortunate that I did not have to accompany her while shopping, looking at the amounts of bags that were lying around in her living area. To some extent, I know a lot of preparation goes into getting married, but for reasons unknown, my friend only saw marriage as a way of buying stuff, which she will only wear once in a lifetime. One by one, she started opening the packages. As the bangles, followed by jewellery, some head and waist stuff (which I do not know what they are called) was placed on the table; I wondered how these brides are even able to walk properly. Next, she showed me a blood red coloured lehenga, which felt quite heavy. I asked how much it weighs, to which she responds with twenty kilos. I was left dumbfounded, if you carry four of these, you will be carrying me in clothing form. I have a question: what are these things made from, Iron?!I was bored looking at the shiny things that I did not understand or cared, but that still did not matter to Monica as she was on the after effects of the drug called shopping. My eyes even started to wander towards the television on which some soap was running. By the looks of it, the soap had a bad actor with a beard with one single expression in which he would stare at the camera as though he was brought to notice that he has to shave. After sometime, her mom brought a cup of tea for me. It was steaming hot, so I decided to let it cool a bit. Like any normal human being, I placed my cup on the table in front of me. As soon as my cup touched the table, Monica screeching voice blew my eardrums. ‘GET YOUR CUP OF THE TABLE!’ Her nostrils were flaring so much that I could see her brain from where I was sitting. Apparently, I had placed my teacup near her twenty-kilo lehenga. For any rational mind, there was a distance of one foot between the cup and lehenga. However, as I do not know how a soon-to-be-bride mind works, I suppose, to her I was placing my cup on the saree, and using it as a handkerchief. $#$#$#$#$#So people, I have proof now that: Girls are crazy over their dresses. The craziest one is the bride-to-be, and I shit you not, but there is a hierarchy. Your craziness level is = to how closely you are related to the bride to be. Fun fact: When a man is about to get married, he just focuses all his energy into losing weight.
So what do you think? DO girls get a little over board with their dresses, if yes comment below and let me know, and if you enjoyed what you read, hit the like button.