Self Expression Magazine

Friendships

Posted on the 23 October 2013 by Wifessionals @wifessionals
Friendships
I am so beyond thankful for the friends Abba has placed in my life. They've become my family and the people I trust in the very most. Each one of them brings out a different part of me and through them I learn more about myself and Christ.
I've been thinking about something a lot lately. I am who I hang out with. Whether I like it or not I eventually start picking up on the behavior, sayings, jokes, attitude - you name it - of the people I spend the most time with.
One silly thing I picked up from one of my good friends, Claire, is a southern saying. Claire would always joke with us, "You're movin' like pond water!" Now, northern me would never have even thought to come up with this kind of creative way to tell my friends they need to pick up the pace, but I thought it was absolutely hysterical when I first heard her say it. And guess what? I've added it to my own vocabulary.
BUT.
Not all the habits I pick up from my friends are so innocent and humorous.
Friendships My bestest friends - my home away from home
When I was a freshman in college I decided that, because I could pick my friends easily, I was going to make sure all of them would challenge me to grow in Christ.
I was so exhausted from feeling like I was the only sane one in high school. All of the people around me were drinking, smoking pot, dealing, hurting themselves physically, sleeping around, or just simply stewing in their own bad attitudes. Of course I had great close friends and family, but those people I surrounded myself with definitely had an impact on my life.
I can gladly say I have never messed with any drugs, smoked a cigarette, or forgotten what I did the night before. But honestly, that was only by the grace of God. I firmly believe that it was not on my own strength that I refused my friends' offers and pleads - I simply had no desire for any of it - and that was all God.
But even though I never did any of it myself I was completely immersed in it. A lot of my high school years consisted of my closest friends being hurt so deeply by suicidal thoughts and actions, drugs, horrible sex offenses... and the list goes on.
FriendshipsTwo of my very best friends
If it wasn't for my strong-willed, supportive family I would never have made it out alive. I would not be who I am today. They are the only reason why I did not partake in any of it and why I didn't lose a hold of my joy.
When I got to college the first thing I did was to make sure the group of people I was building friendships with would inspire and encourage me. Because college is especially a time of discovering who I would be I knew I needed people who I could lean on and who would challenge me to grow and better myself - instead of giving me the idea that focusing my life and efforts around temporary things would somehow be fulfilling.
FriendshipsSome of my loving cousins :)
A problem arises when I think that I am strong enough to stay completely 100% true to who I am when I'm surrounded by people who do not push me to be a better version of myself.
We all know it too. The more I hang out with certain groups of people the more I start to think and act like them. If I am surrounded by people who are successful, driven, and determined, I will be inspired and pushed to try harder and to grow despite how scary it might be at first.
However, on the flip side, if I spend my time with people who gossip, complain, are disrespectful to their peers, and have trouble finding alternative perspectives to a situation, then I will ultimately lose my joy and quite honestly, become a little crabby. (sorry to say that possibly too honestly - but it is true) 
I took some time to really think about this. Who will I become because of the people I spend time with?  Who do I want to be?
No matter how much I love and care for them, the people in my life will affect me one way or another. The question is, do I want to be challenged to do hard things or to be convinced that revolving my life around temporary, good-feeling things will fill that gaping hole in my heart?
And here's the best part - I saved it for last - because the people I spend the most time with encourage, inspire, and drive me to become a better version of myself, I can turn around and show others that there is a better, easier, and much more fun way to live life. It's a perfect cycle. And I think that's how it's supposed to be :)
Friendships
Check out one of the sweetest ladies I know:

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