Like yesterday when it was 8am, there were 4 other people on the elevator and it was totally silent, because none of us were wanting to be awake. We had to stop on each floor to gather more and more people, which made our 4 floor commute seem like 40 floors. I was slowly being pushed further and further back into the corner. I am already way shorter than everyone, but to make it worse.. I had a hiccup attack. Every other second I made that high squeaky noise, and by the end of our ride everyone piled out and I felt like they all just stared me down. C'mon people, it's only hiccups! Hold your judgmental horses, why don't you?
Anyway back to how classy I am. I don't burp, I will never ever fart in front of another human. I am completely disgusted by this. One time I told my sister in law that, and she was so confused. She told me that her and her husband fart all the time, and they just avoid farting on each other. It's so hard being perfect like me and my no burping and farting rule.
I do have one thing I do, that's right only one, that is pretty gross. At least I think it is. I get it from my dad. I used to snack a lot,not because I was a hungry hungry hippo, it's just something to do. Like people who smoke, I don't think they really love it, but it's something to do. You don't know what to do without chips when you're on a couch or when you're outside without a cig. I get it. After high school I had plumped the belly. I decided to cute out my snacking and be more strict on only eating when I'm hungry. I still get the fever though. I get the snacking fever. Instead of pulling out chips, I buy sunflower seeds.
Seeds aren't' that gross right? Well when you eat them and you're inside it gets dirty. Down right dirty! I have to find things to spit my seeds in. Water bottles, bowls, cups, whatever is there I will take it. I promise. The gross part is that then you have a spit cup. You are carrying around something you've been spitting into for hours. A slobbery, seed filled mess! have you ever spilled that cup?! Me too. Then you have to pick up each seed one by one. That's right pick up the soggy, wet chewed up seeds one by one.
There's my confession. I'm gross.
