I decided to draw myself a mind map on how to make a living by being a geek. I know that there is almost certainly no way that I'll achieve this, but having a plan isn't going to hurt, and it was fun to do.
Hang on - I need to move into "internet marketer speak" to do this blog post properly...
The Fortune Making Mind Map that THEY don't want you to know about!
Hi, I'm Mike Raven, and I used to be just like you.
Then I ate a lot of food, and now I'm twice the person you are.
But you can become like me too!
They don't want you to know about this secret. Tired of the 9-to-5? Bored of being a rat in the the rat race?
Want to be happy by earning $000s while sitting at home?
Follow these five steps for eternal bliss...
5 - Make the commitment.
Quit your job. Are you having fun? Stop that. Sit at home and sweat, baby. Put the time in and the rewards will come. Learn SEO. And memes.
4 - Get out there.
Network, it's not who you know, it's who the people you know know. And who they know too.
3 - READ THE MIND MAP
Read the mind map below.
But not yet - keep reading the five steps first.
2 - FOLLOW THE MIND MAP
Do what the mind map says.
Do that now.
1 - LIVE IN ETERNAL BLISS
Go to Eternal Bliss now!
(Disclaimer: All the above is bad advice, or at best variable advice. Putting the time in to something that you care about is probably a good thing. The rest is pretty poor)
Okay, now that's over, here's the mind map. Enjoy!
If you want to be a writer can I recommend this article by James Altucher that I read on Lifehacker this morning - well worth a read.
Otherwise, if you enjoyed this parody of internet marketing, check out my SEO blog post from a while back, Or even a slightly more serious one about gamification.
On the other hand, my most popular blog post is about being unable to locate nappies (aka diapers). So try that instead.