I am a woman, not an object. I cannot be purchased; a value cannot be placed on my life. I may choose to pledge my soul, I may choose to give my heart. Yet, this would not render me incapable of making my own decisions. This would not eliminate the fact that I have a mind of my own.
Allegiance to another human being does not mean giving up my identity. It does not mean sacrificing my dreams. It does not mean losing my voice. It especially does not mean that anyone but myself has the right to speak on my behalf and make my choices for me.
My body is my body, my mind is my mind, my emotions are my own and my soul is definitely not yours.
I wish more women understood, to share in something like marriage does not mean being ‘owned’. Instead, it means choosing to share yourself with another.
I wish more girls were brought up to understand and believe that the value we place on ourselves does not have to come from a place we hold in society.
I wish that so many girls, around the world, did not feel as though their place in this world was determined by how they were treated by another.
I wish more parents understood, the effect they are having on a generation of women, by raising them with the ingrained belief that their happiness and security was tied to anything or anyone but themselves. That their right to explore this world and all the choices it has for them, is tied to another person.
It is easy for me to stand back and evaluate a necessary social change with this kind of insight. However, social change isn’t something that can be brought on by mere hoping, it requires action. Yet, I hope that I live to see a world where women aren’t bound by ‘needing’ a partner to make their dreams come true. Where women aren’t constricted in happiness because of the ingrained belief that, after a certain age, without a partner they are somehow ‘less’ or ‘diminished’. I hope I live to see the day that women realize that the fact that society is seeing them a particular way or judging them for a choice means nothing. Despite understanding that I am asking for a change that has been disregarded by many, men and women alike, I hope for it.
I plan to live to see the day because, if I ever have children, this is the way I will raise them.
First, I will teach them to recognize the rights from wrongs.
Then, I will make sure they grow brave enough to call out an issue, when they see it, as they see it. I will tell them that the year 2018 needed a #MeToo movement, attempting to convey the significance of that.
Following this, I intend to encourage them to enroll in self-defense classes and send them into the world confident that they can protect themselves, regardless of their sex.
Subsequently, I plan to teach them that if anyone tries to tell them their worth and their value is tied to what happens around them, they are to ignore it.
I will teach them to evaluate themselves based on the kindness they show others as opposed to the way others evaluate them.
I hope to raise the next generation as proud feminists.
This is my truth, expressed from the heart. I wish for a world where we could see what society wishes for us, take the good from it, leave the bad behind, and be fearless in our pursuit of happiness.
Be relentless in the search of ourselves as people, regardless of what anyone else has to say about it.