Kia 4 – Hi Mummy
Me; Hi Kia how was school today, did you have a good day?
Kia – Yes didn’t do anything
Me – You didn’t do anything? What did you have for lunch?
Kia – Brocoli, mash potato and salad and then water and fruit and Mr Oxton gave me lots of water
Me – Well that sounds em nice
Kia – Mummy Mr Oxton is a man
Me – Really?
(Off she goes to get out of her uniform and no doubt mess her bedroom up)
Nakita 13 – Mum I need that £40 deposit tomorrow (says as she walks through the front door)
Me – Hi Nik have a good day at school ?
Nakita – Yea suppose so
Me – Great
(She puts her headphones in and walks away)
Cameron 9 – Hi mum
Me – Hi Cam have a good day at school?
Cameron – Mum I don’t want to go to Taekwondo tonight, I want to concentrate on my boxing
(He runs off)
I go to the toilet, sat having a wee as you do when mid stream the door opens and Kaiden 3 is smiling at me
Kaiden – Are you having a wee or poo mummy?
Me – Having a wee
Kaiden – I like your stripy pants
Me – Em thanks
Kaiden – Mummy where’s my willy?
Me – Em inside your nappy. Go get your big boy pants on and use the toilet for a wee like a big boy
Kaiden – Not today thanks
(He closes the door and walks off)
Seriously my kids are as crazy as me!