I'm Gonna Write a Children's Book for the Childrens

Posted on the 04 January 2012 by Cantuccfd @cantuCCFD


(This isn't the children's book)
What you're looking at is the next major project i'm undertaking. It was mentioned in the "Floating and Famous Classmates" post a week ago or so and now i'm getting to 'actual' work on it. I pretty much have the format i want the book to follow and how it will look. It's just a matter of coming up with 80-100 different Guinness beer floats to fill the book with. A project that will no doubt be very fun throughout. I've said it before and i'll say it again:
I love Guinness. I'll keep you posted.
Funny story: (and the reason for this post's title) Last night i get a message from a friend asking for a favor. She's a writer and after complementing my blog and my style of writing she says she wants me to take a look at something she's looking to get published. Wow. That's actually flattering. "What is it?" i ask. "A children's book," she says.
[..I am Eric's cluelessness shooting into the stratosphere..]
Anything but a children's book. I know zero about children's books. I told her that me giving an opinion on a children's book is like one of my exes giving an opinion on quantum physics. (Thanks for the analogy, Tori). But, of course, initially i'm pretty bad at explaining myself, especially over chat, so i'm sure it came off like i just didn't want to read her work, and the more i explained, the more i think she probably became insulted. The truth is i'm very, very flattered to be asked, truly, but i'd have been totally clueless. If it was any other kind of story i'd have had no problem, but a children's book? Me? No Bueno. Plan was to meet me at Whataburger or something and actually watch me read it too. I told her i would have made her close her eyes while i read it and when she opened her eyes there would be a He-Man doll sitting across from her with a note saying "Thanks for the burger. Nice book."
 
In unrelated news, two dreams of mine came true.

Whataburger now sells SPICY KETCHUP! Can you read the ingredients? Actual jalapeno pepper puree. It's perfect. And if that wasn't enough, i can now scratch off "Have a pornstar reply to one of my tweets" from my bucket list (She said "cool" too which means she totally wants me to bang her). Two dreams accomplished in about an 18 hour span. Nice.
I think i'm gonna watch a movie now. TB recommended it. "Last Night" with Keira Knightly. If i like it you get a gold star, TB. By cosmic coincedence she also happened to be watching "200 Cigarettes" earlier tonight and was tweeting about it. That's the one with Courtney Hole Love and Kate Hudson from years back. I had literally been looking for it on Netflix 20 minutes before i saw her tweet. I always wanted to see that movie and never got around to it. Cool. Burn it, TB. Send it, TB. Thank you, TB.
It's getting late if i want to watch this movie. Part 2 of our consumption drill is tomorrow. Gonna watch this movie, go to bed, rest up, and head to the station tomorrow. Nite.