Not too big, not too small, just the size of Montreal.
The Queen’s knickers, that is.
Okay. Okay. I lie like a rug.
I saw London.
I didn’t see France.
Thank Gawd I didn’t see her Majesty’s underpants.
My bet is that she has a bedazzled thong throne.
Oh please Lordy Lord Lord oh Lordy, don’t tell the Queen I talked about her knickers.
I’d be royally screwed.
Excuse the pun.
These fellas would not approve
Psssstt….This isn’t a real blog post.
It’s a travel journey and you are coming on a wee hop skip and jump to London, UK.
I thought you may enjoy a trip down London lane.
A little break from it all.
Travel changes things up, doesn’t it? Need a change in perspective? Travel. Need to take a breather ? Travel. Need to realize that your own big problems are actually small in the big scheme of things? Travel. Need a change of focus and a chance to recharge your batteries? Travel.
Hit the reset button.
TRAVEL.
The world is a book and those who do not travel read only one page.
Travel can even mean taking a trip down the road. It can mean a trip to a friend’s house.
Do it.
Take the time for YOU.
Don’t have the time or resources for a jet plane? No probs.
We can travel together on the blog.
Ready ?
Your trip to London is about to begin.
It’s an awesome place to travel to.
Why?
The English language is blooming marvelous.
Because even when the English say….
bugger off you dim wit,
or
don’t get your knickers in a knot
what a load of rubbish
sod off
you cheeky bugger
or
I’m absolutely buggered….
it all just sounds great.
Those words can make a road trip ~ EPIC fun. Ready to roll on your trip?
The first stop : The W Hotel at Leicester Square.
Wooohooo !!! That hotel rocks out loud. I left there kicking and screaming and hanging on to the chandelier. I can’t believe they made me leave. I pitched a fit and had a temper tantrum leaving. I could live in that hotel. Permanently.
The rooms are very James Bond-ish
Reality sucks when you have to go home and make your own bed.
~ And ~
I want a chambermaid. Every day.
Only if they spoke to me with an English accent and taught me English potty mouth.
Jolly lovely.
Almost as lovely as the hotel lounge …..
Another reason to travel to London : The pubs.
D’best.
I discovered this site before I traveled : Visit Britain. It was pretty cool. Did you know that you can rent a portable mobile hotspot for use in the UK ? Brilliant !!!
If you have ever paid data roaming charges you will know exactly what I am talking about. Data roaming bites. Data roaming costs just suck it. Don’t do data roaming. It is all wrong. You will need a second mortgage to pay for it. Use wi-fi or rent a wee mobile hotspot to use for your phone or laptop. It’s fab.
In the UK, the device is called TEP.
WiFi in your pocket. What a fan-tab-ulous idea. If only I could fit a box of chocolates in my pocket. That would be the best travel accessory evvvvvha.
Or mashed potatoes.
The ultimate comfort food.
…..And….
Anything with the word PIE or GRAVY is an automatic bestie.
Add the word KIDNEY and I am outta there.
Steak and Kidney pie.
What the what what?
Ewwwwh.
Tea, clotted cream and scones…
Come to momma.
This explains muffin top. Carbalicious.
Btw’s…
Look who is hanging out at the Tower of London.
How epic cool is this fella?…..
Who knew that chicken wire could be so funky ?
I feel the same way just thinking about my muffin top.
Are you ready to wander around the Tower of London ? Here we go. Just breathe in the history.
To tell you the truth, I didn’t get absorbed into British history until I read Philippa Gregory. Philippa Gregory has been described as the master chronicler of British royal history. I would describe her as having an epic talent for taking boring history and turning it into sexy romantic story telling.
Normally, the word history just makes me want to yawn. A big ugly yawn. Not anymore. I was hooked after reading The Other Boleyn Girl. Then I fell head over heels in love with The Boleyn Inheritance and lost myself in The Constant Princess (Boleyn).
As a kid, history class was always the best place to catch a nap. Philippa’s books changed my view about history. Not one yawn.
Her books will have you lost in a world of Kings and Queens and all their raunchiness between the stone walls.
Her stories make you feel like you are standing in the Tower of London feeling the pain of a Queen preparing for a beheading. She takes you into a journey that is passionate and real. It is like Downton Abbey on steroids. Sexy ones. The kind where you find yourself living amongst the Kings and Queens and you don’t want to leave. With or without your head.
Do you think Philippa would be flabbergasted to see this fella with poor posture at the Tower of London? Awhhh, maybe he was knackered ?
What a silly old sausage.
Posture reality check. He might be a smurf.
I hope the Queen doesn’t find out that he is looking a bit daft.
Actually, I don’t blame him.
It would take serious concentration to avert the eyes from nutty tourists dancing about trying to distract him.
Yup. Good luck with that.
Royal concentration minus the Royal stance.
Note to self : Do not strip naked in front of the guards. You will not get a reaction.
Scaffold ? Bloody tower ? Eeek. Jewels please.
The old and the new.
Modern art mixed amongst the Tower walls.
Ahhhmazing
London… you are pretty.
Sexy architecture. Everywhere.
I wanted to steal that clock for my barn. No joke.
LONDON
Full of simple beauty.
Full of naked characters ~ perched with bow and arrow.
CUPID
What a fella.
Honestly. Breathtaking.
LONDON
Eye candy.
Stunning architecture.
Gorgeous admiration.
Inspiring awe.
Even flag gorgeousness.
This city will wet your whistle with its awesomeness.
The designer in me had my mind wandering with ideas.
Telephone booths in London are so gorgeous.
Yet useless now.
Who needs a phone booth?
Who doesn’t have a mobile?
Who doesn’t need a washroom break?
I personally think the phone booths would be great as converted public potties.
Practical idea minus the dreaded complication of attaching a septic tank. LOL.
Our bladders would smile though, wouldn’t they?
Replace the glass panes with mirror panes.
Bob’s your uncle.
Done.
Pretty.
I know what you are thinking. She is a dim wit.
Okay. Keep thinking. Maybe we can collectively come up with a designer idea for the phone booths of London.
Mobile charging stations?
Magazine stand?
Hmmm….
The only thing missing is a red pair of shoes
Are you dreaming up some ideas?
Hop to it…. Share with sugar bear.
Cheerio !