It’s Just My Life… You Wouldn’t Understand!

Posted on the 09 May 2014 by #hartchronicles @jewelsjaye

You should have seen me… Hair pulled up, sporty outfit swag turnt to the max, I was a BEAST at the Teachers vs. Students kickball game today!

… and it was all DOWNHILL from there!

I was on top of the world

1. I kicked! Just a bunt because the 9/10th graders (reigning champions) were super intenso and made it their life’s mission to catch every single pop-up ball that was kicked. #IntenseMuch

2. I got to 1st! I over-ran it (couldn’t stop If I wanted to), and made it unscathed! #EPIC

3. After trucking one of my beloved English I students that was standing in the baseline, I made it to 2nd! I couldn’t over-run the base again because they were after me and I couldn’t stop because my brakes weren’t working, so I grabbed the 2nd baseman (another one of my students… he yelled, “Ouch!” and I yelled, “Sorry!”), I jumped on the base, and just held on for dear life! #WINNING

4. I rounded 3rd and kept on running! Some kid dropped the ball and I was home free! I heard “Mrs. Hart’s out there ridin’!”(slang for running fast) and “Mrs. Hart thinks she’s Wilma Rudolf!” from the student dugout and, “I’m putting this on Instagram!” #KidsTheseDays

And then the tides turned…

5. Just when I could taste sweet victory, DISASTER STRUCK! While running home, I fell to the ground 3/4 of the way between 3rd and home base! I don’t know what happened. I was running and my legs wouldn’t go as fast as I wanted them to. They just gave out, or I tripped, or Who Knows?! I skinned my elbow, bruised both palms, and my chest and tights were covered in dust! #FAIL

6. From the ground, I literally heard the Rocky theme song in my head! I could not just lie there and let these jokers tag me out! I wouldn’t hear the end of it on Monday! So, I jumped up and I friggin’ made it home! (Can you believe it?!… Me neither!) At home base, a kid caught the ball just as I got there, but he threw the ball at me (instead of tagging the base) and he MISSED and I scored our first home run!!! Ha-ha! #OdetoJOY

7. During my victory dance, (riddled with screaming and arm flailing) I FELL AGAIN! Yep, again! I jumped on the umpire who was caught off guard and unprepared to support my weight, and we BOTH fell to the ground! He’s 60 years old and in impeccable shape, but I didn’t warn him so DOWN WE WENT! He was wearing shades and as we fell I could totally see the whites of his eyes! (They were stretched pretty wide!) I started laughing because it all seemed to happen in slow motion, then I apologized and asked him if he was okay because he broke my fall! (My 2nd fall!) The students were in an uproar, but that was short lived because they wanted to argue the call with the umpire! So I helped him up and danced away, while he argued the call with the kids! #iWINagain

8. It literally took me 2 innings to catch my breath! I cannot believe how out of shape I am! #TisTrue

9. Fast-forward… The Game goes on, I’m still in recovery mode, we win 3-0, the bell rings, the kids are boarding buses, and I don’t get to rub it in like I wanted to or look at the videos the students took of me (to post on all social media outlets) because I feel SICK! Like lightheaded and weird, but ok! So I decide that instead of seeing the kids off, I need to cut out early and get to some air-conditioning! #STAT

10. I walk across the campus and just before I get to the door I PUKE IN THE FRIGGIN’ GRASS! Like Willie Beaman on the movie Any Given Sunday! THANK GOD no one’s around! (Of course I checked!) I immediately thought of my husband, who always says… A good leg workout+ Florida sun+ being completely out of shape= THROW UP! (And that’s exactly what happened) I instantly felt better though! #LearnedthatLesson

11. I had to clean up in the student bathroom because I couldn’t make it to the staff bathroom without anyone seeing me! #ShortestHorrorStory

Finally, I made it to my room, snatched up my purse and belongings, and got the heck up outta there; heading straight home to hit the shower and pull myself together! #DoNotPassGo

In Hindsight, I was in NO SHAPE to be team MVP today, but I sure gave it my all… And then some!

#ThankGodItsFriday