I subscribe to the newsletter of Nils and Jonas of NJ Life Hacks and wanted to share the delightful wisdom from their latest where they talk about how Joy shared is joy doubled.
I first discovered The Little Book of Stoicism - Timeless Wisdom to Gain Resilience, Confidence, and Calmness by Jonas Salzgeber a couple of years ago and enjoyed it tremendously. I immediately visited the website and got engrossed there for a while.
When Nils mentioned talking to his old high school friends about the great times they had back then, I couldn't help but think of my own school WhatsApp group - 30 of us, and a high rate of engagement on a daily basis. And yes, we do recall vividly how we got on our teachers' nerves, annoyed our parents but overall, had such a good time. It feels wonderful to talk and reminisce about those times.
"Friendship produces between us a partnership in all our interests. There is no such thing as good or bad fortune for the individual; we live in common. And no one can live happily who has regard to himself alone and transforms everything into a question of his own utility; you must live for your neighbor, if you would live for yourself. " Seneca
It is also nice to remember tough times we've overcome, people we have met, travel memories, memorable incidents and so on.
As Nils says, sharing memories brings a wonderful feeling. There is a pleasant sense of wellbeing and I can't help smiling as I recall incidents. It is like a mini-vacation in my head. Then, of course, as you know, nostalgia lane, memory street is filled with laughter.
But it's not just me who feels this way. There is research to prove that sharing memories with friends and family has great benefits. Social connection can be a rich source of happiness.
Mutual reminiscence - sharing memories with other people - is accompanied by abundant positive emotions such as joy, accomplishment, amusement, contentment and pride, Nils says.
"Shared joy is double joy; shared sorrow is half sorrow. " Swedish Proverb
Sharing memories with friends and family and reminiscing is a natural thing. But you can actually make it happen more often and experience more joy.
Here are just a few ideas from Nils Salzgeber to get you thinking:
Share funny and embarrassing moments with your co-workers
This is a great way to make yourself more relatable and likeable at work. Share funny stories you tell your family or funny things that have happened to you. That reminds me of a particularly embarrassing moment at work - my boss walked into the office and asked for something and I put my hand into my bag to take out my pen. What followed with the pen, entangled, was my bra. Don't ask. It was a particularly warm day and I had quietly taken it off and stuffed it in my bag. In my defense, I was wearing a loose top. Sigh. Yep - go ahead and visualize that and have a good laugh!
Plan some fun times with your significant other
Make sure it is something both of you enjoy doing - could be a long walk, cooking together or watching a movie you both want to watch. Then talk about it afterwards.
Pick up the phone and call a close friend to share a positive experience
This doesn't have to be some major thing - it could be something as simple as something you recently cooked or an outing you enjoyed.
Plan a fun weekend with your friend
Or at least work in a couple of hours of fun with your friend - a picnic, a hobby class, a dance class, or visit that entertainment park and ride the rollercoaster together. And scream your head off. Or not. But yes, laugh a lot.
This is one of my favorites - I am lucky to have friends I've gone on trips with. Look at the photos together and reminisce about the memorable moments and the funny things that happened. I am betting you want to do it all again!
Have a karaoke night with friends or family
Nothing is more giggle-worthy than grabbing that mic and singing along - tunelessly, out of pitch and pretending you are on American Idol. Makes for great memories to share for later.
A parent? Ask your kids to describe the five best things that happened to them recently
Then ask them their favorite of the five. You do the same. Enjoy the game!
Did you not love that? Joy shared is indeed joy doubled. Now please do check out The Little Book of Stoicism by Jonas Salzgeber. Here's the book blurb: "How long are you going to wait before you demand the best for yourself?" Where can you find joy? Gain strength? How should we face our fears? Deal with the death of a loved one? And what about those reoccurring depressing thoughts? While traditional schooling doesn't address such questions, it's exactly what ancient schools of philosophy were all about: They taught you how to live. Even though these schools don't exist anymore, you and I and most people are in as much need of a philosophy that guides us through life as we ever were. This compelling, highly actionable guide shows you how to deal more effectively with whatever life throws at you and live up to your best self. A mix of timeless wisdom and empowering advice, The Little Book of Stoicism will point the way to anyone seeking a calm and wise life in a chaotic world. - Epictetus, Stoic philosopherYou will love it!
