I have been living with my mother-in-law for the past 4 months. I'm sure people wonder how this arrangement has worked out for us - especially because you often hear of major daughter-in-law/mother-in-law conflicts. There's definitely been some "interesting" issues we've come across and had to deal with...The most obvious issue is that you have little to no privacy or alone time. You also have to be conscious of taking a third person's opinion or taste into decisions. You may even be lucky enough to wake up and overhear your mother-in-law telling other family members that you and your husband "sure are restless sleepers" ::yes this happened and it was mortifying::
But I wouldn't consider any of those things to be major problems. In fact, living with my mother-in-law has actually been an incredible blessing to me. When I first moved in, I felt incredibly awkward. I have always gotten along with Ryan's mom, but it still feels weird to move in to someone else's home. I felt like I was walking on eggshells. I didn't want to cook anything she didn't like, I didn't want to do too much laundry, I didn't want Rilynn to wake her up in the middle of the night. As time passed, I began to grow more comfortable and can now easily tell you details about her daily routine, foods she likes and doesn't like & ways I've noticed that I can help her out. I would be lying if I said that it's easy to go from living in your own house to living with someone else - it's not. But what it has done for me is help me to grow my patience and learn to be more flexible.
Ryan's mom was beginning radiation when we moved in. Over the past few months we've tried to help her out as much as possible. This was one reason that we thought God may be allowing us to be in the situation we are. If we weren't here, my mother-in-law would be alone. I have done my best to cook dinner every night and do the grocery shopping so she doesn't have that burden. Ryan has helped her repair things around the house or gone on different errands with her. I am so grateful for this tremendous blessing she has given us, and we've tried to be as much of a blessing to her.
The best thing about living with my mother-in-law is that it has given me a chance to really get to know her better. I've had a lot of precious time to just sit and chat or spend quality time just hanging out. She is someone I admire very much. She has battled (and beaten) cancer multiple times, raised 5 amazing children and has a true talent for making other people feel welcomed and loved. It has also been extremely special for Rilynn to share these four months with her grandmother. Ryan's mom has gotten to experience so many "firsts" - Rilynn rolling over, sitting up, her first two teeth and starting solids. It has been a huge adjustment becoming a mom and I've loved getting to ask her questions or learn tips and tricks on how she managed to have five little ones!
A lot of people may focus on the negative in a situation like this. Instead, I've tried to take a step back and focus on all the ways we can be appreciative and grateful for these past four months. We've overcome the issues that have come up and I can honestly say this has been a wonderful experience. I know we will look back and cherish this time that we have had with her & we will be forever thankful that she blessed us during this time of our lives.
