Marriage is Like a Bank Account.

Marriage is like a bank account if you don't put anything in, you won't get anything out. Jared and I are working really hard to better our marriage. We both want certain things out of our marriage, and we need to work to achieve them. We've had a rough few months. When I say it's been rough I don't mean that we're in a trial separation, I mean that marriage is still a relationship that needs attention. You don't date, fall in love, get engaged, plan a wedding and get married and that's it. Getting married isn't the end goal, having a marriage is.

In a marriage you really have to make time for one another and fulfill each others needs and wants. Just because you see each other every day that doesn't qualify for spending quality time together. Make an effort just like when you were dating. I know I know this is much easier said than done. Jared and I are working so hard on this. There's a delicate balance between me time and our quality time. Remember when you didn't have it in the bag, when you still wanted to make an impression? What did you do? Leave love notes, go out on dates, dress to impress, cuddle, leave paw prints on your wife's car? (long story - long wonderful story) Keep doing those things! My goal this week is love notes. When Jared and I were dating I used to leave him notes every morning. I was out of the house before he woke up and I always left him notes on the counter, on my pillow, on his car, and a few years later I found that he'd kept a bunch of them. It meant so much to me and it must have meant a lot to him as well. I need to do that again, I need to show him I love him and not just text him about vet bills and knee braces. That's boring.

I don't know if you know this, but there isn't a tell all marriage rule book. You can have 100 marriages around you to look up to, but those people aren't you and that's not your marriage. When you say "I do" you're embarking on your own adventure and your committing to pave your own path with your partner.
I am not sure why I decided to write this post. I am in love with my husband, head over heels, hand over fist in love and even then our marriage still takes a lot of work. There are days better than others. I wanted to let you know that it's okay to be open about marriage being difficult and not to feel like a failure. I hate pinterest and facebook, because I didn't write 52 love notes on a deck of cards for Valentines, I didn't plan a whole year worth of dates, my house isn't always perfect and my husband doesn't' buy me flowers for our 19 month-a-versary. Pinterest doesn't show you that I will wake up and rub Jared's head when he has migraines at 3am or that Jared will wake me up when I have nightmares and then tickle my face till I fall asleep. That's love. Screw that deck of cards.

Don't feel like a failure. Work hard at your marriage and it will be the most rewarding feeling you've ever accomplished.
"You wanna be happy? Find someone you like and never let them go!" -Friends with Benefits
Do you agree that marriage is hard work?