Migraines, Depression and Negativity, Oh My!

Posted on the 27 August 2014 by Latinaprpro @latinaprpro
I grew up watching my mom coil in pain from severe migraines. As I child, I really didn't understand why my mom needed to be in a dark room void of any sunlight and noise.
Whether stress, change of weather, or just life, I don't think my mom ever figured out why she suffered migraines, how to prevent them, but most importantly, how to stop them.
When I grew up, I had a headache or two. Usually when I was sick, mostly when I was stressed. But I didn't suffer a migraine until I started working in PR.
I will never forget that awful throbbing pain in my forehead accompanied with severe nausea and sensitivity to light, touch, smells, noise...anything really. For a few years I had to carry pre-migraine medication and medication to take at the onset of a migraine.
This situation lasted for a few years until I quit that job. Who knew? Work stress and commuting were both triggers for my migraines...and ever since leaving that job almost ten years ago, I've only suffered through a counted number of migraines, and never as severe as before.
It's because of this, that I am always hyper sensitive to people throwing around the word "migraine" to describe their every day aches and pains...especially when they claim they have a migraine on social media.
Let me tell you, if you haven't destroyed your laptop, phone or computer from throwing-up your last meal, you really don't have a migraine.
Then I got to thinking about other situations that are also labeled wrong, and how many times we over exaggerate to make a point or to possibly gain the sympathy of well-meaning folks. But other times, people that really know what it's like to "suffer" these situations, roll their eyes and generally feel belittled when folks downplay something as serious as...
Depression
How many times have you heard your best friend vent after a breakup sobbing about her "depression." Depression?!
Let that sink for a moment as someone that really knows what clinical depression is and manages life against all odds, watches a friend throw-around a breakup that has nothing to do with depression.
Yes she's sad, incredibly sad. Unable to work, even shower or possibly function - but is that depression? Not really. Depression is so much more than that. Stop using that term to describe anything that makes you "said."
But using "depression" or "migraine" to describe anything but, is just the tip of the iceberg. These are just two terms or the many that folks use interchangeably without regard of how it makes others feel.
Case in point, someone once called me "shady." Shady because she wasn't privy to my business. Shady because I had signed NDA's that didn't give me the open door policy to share things that were none of her business.
Shady is a term that carries so much weight, when really someone is simply being professional and keeping certain aspects of her business (possibly even life) under wraps or confidential. Nothing wrong with that, but when adding "shady" to the mix, well, it mixes things up.
Another term that drives me batty is "negative." How many times have you heard someone being called negative for simply sharing a contrary or none-popular opinion? Countless. I'm sure.
Maybe you haven't noticed it, but the truth is, just because someone disagrees with a popular opinion doesn't immediately put them in a "negative" category. At least not in my book.
If that were the case, I am surrounded by negative folks. Reality is, I'm surrounded by people that have a larger perspective on life and the world around them. Sometimes we agree, sometimes we disagree, but I would never categorize them as negative when they simply don't agree with my view points.
Lastly, and this is something that I'm constantly put up against, is being called a "Bitch." As a woman, as a Latina, we have a million and one things we can do, but one thing we can't do, is have an opinion. Be strong. Be open. Be honest. Go against the grain.
The moment we do, own who we are, with all the comforts and liabilities of being "us" is, there will be a term that will be immediately be given to us, as a surname no less, to describe the absolute comfort we have when sleeping at night knowing we are living life on our terms.
Bitch.
Oh well, life could be harder - but instead, that is one term that although it drives me crazy, it also gives me great comfort: Those that call me bitch, are the same women that wish they could live life on their own terms - but can't.
Some call it hating, others call it jealously, I call these folks simple-minded and with an intense need to expand their lives.
Maybe they need to read and travel?
There you go! They need to read my blog more - send them on over.
Maybe then they will realize that having an opinion, and calling it as it is, even when called a Bitch, is not a bad thing after all.