Last day of the year.
The morning I saw that a female colleague likely from second year asked me on Facebook to send her my Math seminar work on Thursday. I didn’t see it then as I didn’t have her as a friend, so I asked her if she still needs it. She did and I sent it to her. I wonder what would Reis do in such situation? And I wonder if Andrea mixed fingers to tell I had the same group?
I finally made and sent my I.T. assignment (deadline: midnight).
While M. was at my place, Andrea called me to ask if we needed to upload some other I.T. exercises. At the end of the call I asked her if she had left to Skopje where she had in plan to be for the New Year’s Eve, she said “Yes” and mum wanted I to say “Have a nice time” to her, something that I thought of, but didn’t say not to become closer. Surprise: M. told me he saw her today, who did the mademoiselle think she was lying to?
The New Year’s Eve resembled to last year’s one. Same room, same people, similar atmosphere. After grandma went downstairs, while mum was out of the room, dad was asking me about Muhammed. He was afraid not to pull me in sth like alcohol. He told me to say hi to Muhammed from him, I responded with “If I don’t forget” and he said to ask him when will he take him to Istanbul to which I judged him:
–You want me to say hi to him for use.
Dad was dissatisfied that I don’t accept anything from him (“Nothing I say is valid”). Of course, he had no direct argument, so this followed. How can he from one side teach me of caution from Muhammed, from another one, to see Istanbul. And what? Does it matter? Material or spiritual? Without the people there wouldn’t have been the city. Without God, there wouldn’t have been people.
He entered deeper, supposing he made his mistake with me the period when he was sick, I was sustained from commentary. Yes, that was the mistake. You taught me the professors know everything, you were ideal to me… how else would I bear the disappointment? I knew a version of you, then I saw another version of you, then the pills (i.e. the illness) took over. It wasn’t you anymore. Why would I try? As longs as the pills speak from that man (if he is worthy of a man), I’m not gonna worry if our relationship is not he wishes it was.
This time, I welcomed the New Year with my parents. I fell asleep after 2:40.
…
Here’s my F.B. status I shared from Ni:
No matter if you respect me or not, I’m still happy for you.
2012 to me was a year filled with many unexpected events, through which passed both pleasant and unpleasant feelings, people worthy of remembering and people that only my diary reminds me of, year of hopes, disappointments, endurance, obligations, tests, revelations, sadness, happiness, faith etc…
In 2013 I’m continuing to fight as well, I’m remaining myself, open to everyone who sincerely wants to see me in the real light. Better and more experienced than ever, I wish you all the best in your lives. Shine bright this year too,
I love you.
