I'm feeling rather *fragile* today as it is my darling Dad's birthday.
Yet another 'first' to surmount in this first year without him.
My goodness, this grief business can take you unawares.
I was okay yesterday. Then today dawned and shazam! The waves of grief, pain and desolation have rolled in relentlessly today.
I've been in constant contact with my siblings. We're all feeling it.
The flashbacks to our celebration a year ago have been intense.
As always, I thought "What would Dad say to us now?". I knew the rejoinder would be "Come on! Buck up! Don't be such sad sacks. Let's celebrate being a beautiful family."
So, following that prompt, India, Sam and I visited Dad's favorite nursery and bought some glorious, fragile camellias for my sister and us to plant. We've arranged to get one to my brother over in Adelaide.
Aren't they such divinely delicate flowers? About 35 years ago when we moved into our new house with my newborn brother, Dad planted some camellias a bit like the one above near the entrance to the house. All these years later, they bear the most glorious and bountiful flowers through the long winter we have down here.
My aunt has suggested the perfect spot for it with morning sun. The pixies are looking forward to planting 'Pa's camellia' tomorrow. We're hoping their cousins will do the same. They all feel his loss keenly, in varying degrees. My hope is that these glorious flowers will lift our spirits through the long winter and remind us of the positive, life-loving man my Dad was.
I'll let you know how it grows!
I'd love to hear if any of you have also planted trees in memory of your loved ones. Do share!