Nanny Baird And His Nanny Burgers, Because His Nanny Lockout Laws Just Aren't Nanny Enough

Posted on the 11 May 2016 by Lee Bemrose @LeeBemrose
After reading about the latest Nanny Baird government's exercise in over-regulation (ie: Nope To Medium Rare Hamburgers Due To Misinformation From Overseas Statistics), The Dreaded One and I had a bit of a discussion on the topic of this and the qualifications and experience of council inspectors. I imagined the next-door neighbours over-hearing our discussion and having a discussion of their own:
Bill: Ooh it sounds like Grumpy and The Dreaded One are having a pretty heavy domestic.
Murray: It certainly does. They are really shouting at each other.
Bill: And swearing! Fuck me what a pair of sweary motherfuckers. Really no need for that.
Murray: What's really weird is the argument seems to be about... hamburgers? Are they really arguing about the acceptable serving of hamburger patties?
Bill: Why yes, I do believe you are right, Murray.
Murray: And you know what's really weird, Bill?
Bill: No - what is really weird, Murray?
Murray: If you really listen... through all that shouting and screaming and swearing and things being hurled around the apartment in what is clearly uncontrollable rage... I think they are actually agreeing with each other.
Bill: Fuck me. Now that you mention it, Murray - I do believe you are right. They are actually just enjoying a kind of... orgy of anger at the abject stupidity of The Nanny Baird Government and over-regulation and the incompetence of clip-board muppets who are actually clueless as to how things really are. Those fucktard muppet health inspectors who drop into the kitchen dressed like they are going to an opera opening night instead of wearing regulation non-slip OH&S boots, overalls and high-vis vests... your eyes have kind of glazed over, Murray...
Murray: It was when you said orgy of anger... do you think we could, you know... have our own orgy of anger?
Bill: I don't see why not. Grumpy & The Dreaded One seem to have calmed down now. What do you want to get angry and shouty and orgy-ie about?
Murray: I don't know... how do you feel about Maitreya?