{I wrote this about a week after he was born... I have had a few people ask me if I would share, and I love reading birth stories, so I figured I would share mine too... even if it is 4 months late :) }
My beautiful son Nolan Louis…
I never imagined I would have a son. And from the moment your warm & soft little body was placed on my chest, I was overwhelmed with a love that took over my whole body. You are perfect. The sweetest little face with proportionate features. A button nose, eyes that remind me of your pops, luscious little lips, and light brown hair. You smell absolutely scrumptious, and no matter how many times a day I breathe in your scent, I know once it is gone, I will never smell anything like it again. You have already mastered some of the cutest little facial expressions. You have long fingers, long arms, and the cutest, most perfect little feet and toes. You and I have locked eyes several times, and my goodness, you are the sweetest little guy. Your daddy and I are both crazy about you, it’s a feeling I wasn’t certain I would feel… but meeting you for the first time changed my life forever.
The first week of your life has been a busy one. Blessed with family and friends visiting, celebrating the start of the New Year, chasing around your busy big sister, and loving on you in every moment we possibly can. The hardest part of being a mom… your mom… is the despair I feel over how quickly the time passes. This newborn phase of your life, where you are so tiny and helpless is so special – and it kills me to know it will pass too fast. I worry I won’t remember exactly how you look right now, I won’t remember the exact scent, or these sweet tiny sounds you make. But, your daddy reminded me – every minute I spend worrying about the time passing is just a moment I could be spending loving on you.
I can’t believe it’s been just over a week since you made your grand entrance into the world. I had a great pregnancy with you, besides being quite sick for the first 15 or 16 weeks, you remained healthy, strong, and we knew from our monthly ultrasounds that you were growing at a steady pace… measuring about 2-3 weeks big at each phase. I even wondered if they got your due date wrong, but I was assured the very first ultrasound we had at 6 weeks was the most accurate, you are just a big boy! You were closely watched during pregnancy because of the complications I had with your sister, but we loved getting to see you so you often!
I started feeling contractions early with you. Nothing painful, just pressure and tightening and it went on for several weeks before your actual arrival. I knew you were big because your movements were blunt and strong and your daddy and I were often shocked at how much you moved. You made yourself comfortable inside the womb, and I am so glad you grew to your potential. At our 36 week check up, I was told you were close to 7 pounds, bigger than average, and I was 75% effaced and dilated to a 1. The contractions I was feeling were making a slight progress, but I was assured you would stay put for at least a little while longer. I really wanted to get through Christmas, so I did my best to stay off my feet and drink lots of water.
Beginning on Christmas Eve, the contractions I was feeling, although still not very painful, were beginning to get more consistent. I could time them out to be around 5 minutes apart and they would do that for hours at a time. We made it through Christmas, and on December 28th, Gramz, Pops, Auntie Kelly and your cousins came over to help me take the Christmas decorations down. I told Gramz I was in pain… I knew you were big and I was feeling a lot of pressure on my bones. Gramz and Pops stayed the night at our house because daddy was at work and they wanted to make sure that if I happened to go into labor, I wouldn’t be alone. Well it’s a good thing they did. At about 12:30AM on December 29th, I felt a contraction so painful it woke me from my deep sleep. I popped up and thought, “Ouch, wow… this is the real thing!” I texted my mom, who was sleeping downstairs and said: mom… really painful contractions just woke me up. I’ve had 3. Can you come up? She did and said the moment she saw me, she knew it was time to go to the hospital. I texted your daddy, and he left work to drive to the hospital.
After some commotion of getting dressed having these contractions 1-2 minutes apart, I finally got into the car with Pops and he drove me to the hospital. He was so sweet, trying to talk to me through the contractions. The drive went relatively fast, and I was relieved when we made it at about 1:40AM. I went into L&D triage, and the nurse checked me and was a little shocked when she realized I was already 7, almost 8 centimeters dilated and my water bag was "bulging". My body wasn’t wasting any time – and I couldn’t wait to meet you.
The nurse who we saw in triage wasn’t exactly the friendliest nurse. She was a little cold and wasn’t very nice to my dad or TL. After about 10-15 minutes in the triage room, they admitted me into the hospital and rolled me into delivery room 208. As the nurse was getting ready to start my IV, she went to sit in a chair on wheels, and missed the chair and fell onto the floor. She started screaming and crying and when I asked her if she was okay, she said no, that she thought she had broken her wrist! It turned out she did break it and she had to get wheeled out of our room. It was quite chaotic, and luckily there was another nurse in the room who was extremely nice and she jumped into action and got the IV started. I needed it right away so I could get enough fluids in so they could give me an epidural.
The midwife who was helping with admitting me said she wasn’t sure if I would make it very long before your arrival, but they were doing what they could to slow things down slightly so I could get 2 doses of an antibiotic, 4 hours apart. I got the epidural around 3:30AM, and was very relieved when I did. The midwife said if I hadn’t gotten the epidural and if they decided to help break my water, you would have arrived very quickly after I arrived at the hospital. But those antibiotics were important, and when I asked the nurse what doctors were coming on the next shift, I found out the same doctor who delivered Andie was coming on next. I absolutely love her, and knew I wanted her to deliver you as well. So I was willing to do whatever I could to hold off for just a couple hours. Luckily my water never broke, so we were able to do that.
By about 6AM, Gramz, Pops, Auntie Juju and Auntie Kelly were all there. Our neighbor Carol had come over to stay at our house with Andie. Daddy never left my side. I was not in pain anymore, but I could feel those contractions coming on very close together… my body was working hard to get everything ready for your arrival. And you were taking labor like a champ. Your heart rate stayed strong and you never showed any signs of distress.
I could feel lots of urges to push, but held out until I saw Dr. Harrison, who came on the clock at 8am. We were all so excited to see her, and she came into the room with a huge smile and a big hug – and I was relieved. She checked me, and sure enough, right when she did, my water broke, and I was at a 10. She and the nurses prepared the room for delivery… and after just 4 contractions, you made your entrance into the world. The whole pushing time was about 5 minutes. The doctor had to untangle you from the umbilical cord. It was around your neck and wrapped around your chest. You came out with an arm up, instead of your shoulder, but other than that, you came out quickly and smoothly. Before you were even completely out, you were already screaming, which relieved us all because when my water broke they had found a little bit of meconium, which can be dangerous if you inhale it. But sure enough, your strong little lungs were all ready to go and you came out with a scream. Daddy, Gramz, Pops, and your aunties were all able to watch you come into the world, and it was very special.
You were placed on my chest, and I was immediately overwhelmed with an intense love. I couldn’t believe it. I have a son. A beautiful son. I feel so connected to you already, and you are the perfect little addition to our family. Nolan, I hope you know just how much you are loved and adored.
Right now, you are lying next to me in our bed and I am looking over at you studying your face, tiny hands, and features. I am in such awe of you. What a privilege to be your mommy – to be able to see you grow and change everyday.
I love you and I will unconditionally, forever and ever.
Love, Your mama
