I’m far too traumatised.
I’m inconsolable.
Things were idyllic for an all too brief period of time.
Let me paint you a picture while not blogging about it….
I was slim.
I had awesome non-frizzy, shiny hair.
I was in Vegas. In a VIP area. Free-flowing fancy panty bubbly all round.
I was attached to the muscly arms of a godly man-mountain. Possibly The Rock or Vin Diesel.
We were about to kiss.
Alas, my perfect utopia was shattered by a tongue to the face.
And it wasn’t my man-mountain’s.
It was Mstr3 licking my face to wake me up.
Best. Dream. Ever. ruined by my son licking my face and whispering in my ear that he’s got boogies and there’s no tissues.
Really?
Seriously? Expecting these
Instead, I got this
The universe is a bitch sometimes.