I had tossed a few around and then stumbled upon my friend Katie's blog, and read her emotional story of her much awaited pregnancy and the struggles she's been having with it. She chose the word, Surrender.
I complain about the Army; a lot. Complain might be an understatement. I hate the Army. I truly do. I hate it for taking my husband away. I hate it for the stress it causes me. I hate it for the way he is treated. I hate that it has taken us away from our families back home. I hate deployments and worry I will have to do another one, and I hate that I can't control my own life.
So this is where it ends. It causes me too much stress worrying about things I can't control and worrying about "what might be." This is my life for the next 3 or so years and I have to accept it.
So my word, is accept.
It's hard to look at the positives when I feel like I'm surrounded by negatives, but there are a few... It's time for me to start accepting this lifestyle and embracing it. If nothing else, I need to tolerate it and deal with it.
There's not a day that goes by that I'm not proud of my soldier. Do I wish he would have done things differently? Maybe. However, the past cannot be changed and he sacrifices so much everyday so that our family and families around the country can have the freedoms and luxuries we do.
It's time for me to sacrifice a little now too.
I have to accept that he may deploy again. It will rip me apart if that becomes the case but I don't have a choice and I have to accept that. I have to prepare for it and the more I stress and worry about the possibility of it, the worse off I'm going to be.
I have an amazing support system; between family, friends, a military community and now, the blogging community.
I have no doubt in my mind that whatever happens, you all will be there with me 110%, supporting Bubba and myself on the home front.
So here's to accepting what may be and embracing it for the next 3 or so years. I'm going to need a reminder once in awhile but I know the Big Guy has a plan and is watching over us. He's already proved that to me many a times.
What is your one word for 2013?
