I wake, and he is next to me. Swaddled and snuggled against my breast, he sleeps. Biet climbs upon the bed, haphazardly lunging over me to kiss her Papa, then her brother, then her Mama, and finally Nico, who she seeks out under the covers. It is morning, I think. Although it may be well past noon. My eyelids are heavy, begging to close for just a little longer after having woken all throughout the night to tend to alternating babies. Gaby reaches his arm over our family and rests it upon my head. I turn to my love. He looks exactly as I feel: happy, so happy, and utterly exhausted. Biet strokes Lucien's head and kisses his tiny lips over and over, repeating "Hi baby! Hi baby!!" with ascending excitement. I close my eyes for just a minute more, and when I open them the sun has changed through the windows, beaming stronger now across the walls. Lucien nurses. Gaby and Biet are gone, presumably dancing to the music streaming in from the living room. I carry my son to the kitchen and open the fridge to see what I can quickly devour. Nursing two leaves me starving pretty much all day. Gaby takes the baby while I shower and cook, I rest in bed while he takes Biet and Nico out for a walk. The laundry piles in the hamper, although we do manage to wash the dishes. We snuggle a little, play a little, and eat a lot. Suddenly it is nap time, then nighttime. Just as one is on the brink of sleep, the other begins to wail. As soon as that one is calm, the first one is up again and ready to play. This goes on all through the night, or maybe it is only 9pm, its hard to tell. Finally they are slumbering in peace, and we lay in silence and bliss. Lucien will need to eat soon, and Biet will be up and ready for breakfast in a few hours, but in this moment we have each other, and we rest. Before we close our eyes, we talk. We talk in hushed voices about his birth, about the past, and about our plans for the future. We talk about this new adventure that we have embarked upon: parenting two. Since our son arrived one week ago, our world has more or less been flipped upside down. All schedules have been trampled upon, and all expectations have been suspended. Soon we will resume everyday life, but for now, this is all we need. We do all we can to take care of each other, and we wait for a new routine to evolve. We are re-learning how to manage a family, this time with as many children as each of us has hands. Balance will come, and it will be beautiful. But for now, our world is this simple life inside of our apartment, taking everything moment by moment, one day at a time. I know that a time this simple will not come again. Soon Biet will have her own world of friends and school, and Lucien will begin his great journey of lifelong discovery. But now- now all they need is their Mama and Papa, and each other, and this big world of family and food and rest and play inside of our little home. Gaby and I lay side by side in the darkness, ever so grateful to have one another in these amazingly beautiful and trying times. Soon our whispered conversation evolves into sleep-deprived delirious laughter. We laugh and laugh. These are the days, we say. This is family. This is love.
