Do you ever just feel like you have too much on your plate?
I feel like life lately has been one chore to another. Now I know life is always going to be full of tasks to get done, but with planning a wedding, trying to keep this blog less than boring, making time for my family/friends, and yet still enjoying a life with B- I'm exhausted.
My hormones are still out of balance from my issues with my new birth control, so I feel like I am mentally more exhausted than physically. I'm also an over-achiever, and an OCD planner, so for me to feel "behind" on tasks has my stress level maxing out.
I think it all has just hit me pretty hard that this is reality. B and I go on vacation in a little over six weeks, then we turn around and will have around 11 eleven weeks until the wedding. And I'm nowhere near prepared for either. We need to save lots of money for vacation expenses, and then the honeymoon and I have a list of DIY projects that need to start moving to my actual "to do" list instead of the one floating inside my head.
I just love that e-card. But I do have the desire to do it, mostly. I think I'm just feeling stressed because I look at my wedding binder and see the always growing list. I mark one thing off, and five more "chores" arise. I know, I know, I sound like a brat. I don't really mean to complain. I'm just ready for the post-wedding life.
I also don't mean to say I don't like wedding planning. I really have loved it up until the last month or so. The catering part of it REALLY got to me. And I honestly felt like it all fell onto ME. I know it's my wedding and I need to handle this stuff, but I just want someone to help a little bit. And don't get me started on the rude people I've encountered during this. I don't even want to ruin my thoughts with them again. [Just one small rant: If you want to run a business, then run it. Stop acting five. end rant.]
I think a lot of brides-to-be get in this phase. I know one of my dearest friends and I talked about this lately and she said she went through this stage. You just feel like you have the weight of the world on you and only you. Sure, there are people asking if they can help, but most of the time those people are honestly just saying the words and wouldn't really show up when things get tough. That's just life and I'm sure I've been guilty of saying similar things as well over the years. We're all human.
I think I just needed to vent today. And I think this 6 weeks until vacation needs to hurry up. Sunshine, Sand, and Water should help this little water baby's soul. :)
But in the bigger scope of things, I have prayed A LOT over the last few weeks for God to give me some extra determination to get through all these decisions, commitments, etc. So I'm going to make it. I know I can with His help. Just maybe if you get a moment, say a prayer for me. My OCD tendencies are working overtime. :)
