I wrote this earlier today but didn't post because I got distracted, I kinda almost disagree with some of it now, that happens often after I write a post, I'm too lazy to read through this one and make changes, I don't do that. So just imagine that this was posted like 15 hours ago and I might write another one tomorrow to keep this up to date on my shit.
So yesterday was my graduation and I have quite the hangover. I have never been much of a partyer; This was the first party that I had been to that wasn't just being hosted at my house by older people. It was fun, I met and talked to people that I had never talked to before, I tried things I had never tried before, I socialized! There is something to be said about alcohol, it isn't good for you, emotionally or physically. But fun is good for you, socializing is good for you and in cases like mine alcohol is just a catalyst for social interaction, there is nothing wrong with that.
Yesterday before the party I was angry and bitter, just the stress of all my shit weighs me down and I don't enjoy life, I'm not a pessimist, you just can't control joy, you can't just BE happy! Something has to make you happy wither it be an attractive and slightly drunk young lady talking to you for the first time, trying weed for the first time, accidentally kicking a new friend in the face while finding fire wood, or just a laying down next to a fire with your tanquray and listening to live music, or all of the above. I do enjoy occasionally getting drunk now, especially around nice, friendly people.
Before you people get all up in my shit saying stuff like ~ It's bad for you, it's just a temporary fix, get help! I fucking know it is, it's not like I think I can just drink myself to happiness, I'm not a tard. But it's good to just let go sometimes, get your drank on, smoke a pipe that someone hands you; It won't kill you and you will have a good time, at least for the night, god knows I feel like shit today and some of my friends might not be exactly happy with me but that's life, you can't make everyone happy and the one that you should be making happy is yourself. I hate hurting people, I want everyone to be happy, that doesn't work though, not everyone can be happy with you and in trying to make everyone happy, you often forget about yourself.
On a brighter note I'm done school, I graduated, I did my last exam, the ceremonies, all I have left is prom which I am hoping will be a good night with friends, hopefully more partying and bullshiting. Then I'm done, I haven't been doing shit all for the last couple months anyways but this just feels different, it'll be over!! DONE!!