Yes. I had to.
You see, here I was, counting down to Jan 1, 2013, going 5, 4, 3, 2…..and 1….and…0….and here I was, already in 2013 while most of my friends were still enjoying the last few hours of 2012. I went to bed happily, imagining all sorts of things to do on Jan 2013. I woke up, refreshed, even though I only slept about four and a half hours. I lit the lamp, offered fruit and a cup of milk with sugar (I somehow suspect God likes sugar in her milk) and stood in my little prayer room, smiling, thinking of you all, my dear friends and inhaling the gentle scent of the jasmine flowers I had bought the previous day.
As I wished everyone a glorious year ahead in my heart and then made my specific requests on behalf of my friends to God (yes, remember that hotline I have?), my thoughts transitioned to what I would do on this beautiful day. I decided to make a special sweet. I had lots of milk in the fridge and so, decided to make a sweet from it. It involved boiling two liters of milk down to reduce it to a thick sweet fudge flavored with cardamom. Then I wanted to make a chocolate cake.
I began the day in the kitchen, making the coffee lovingly and I visualized all of us sitting together, in a few minutes to enjoy it and share jokes and news. We did. Sury had a working day as he was invited to give a talk at IIIT and soon, he got ready and left. Vidur and I got on with our day. We decided to have pasta for lunch with a mix of cottage cheese+vegetable side-dish which is very very yummy.
I wanted to write a post on New Year’s day, but thought I would postpone the joy to later in the afternoon. The milk sweet takes a couple of hours to make, so I thought I would get that and the cake going. Both came out fabulously and I fondly thought, hopefully both would last as long as it took me to make them. Laughing to myself, I then cooked lunch. Yes, when I plan to make a sweet, I always do it first because I don’t want the smell of onions or garlic to permeate into it as I make lunch. After lunch, we divided the remaining chores like washing up in the kitchen, and washing clothes between us and decided to regroup in two hours.
Around 3 pm, we were done – pleasantly full from lunch and satisfied with tackling all that we had planned for the day. We settled down to work – Vidur to do his quota of holiday homework and I, to take of the various things I do when I sit at the comp. We got the music on to motivate us.
And then it happened
The phone rang.
It was my uncle.
He called to inform us that my aunt, who had been rushed to hospital following a severe stroke and surgery who was in and out of a coma for three months, had passed away at 2.30 pm. Remember I wrote in an older post about this aunt being in a coma? Oh, the sadness! She was my Mom’s sister and one of nine siblings. Now, my Uncle is the only survivor and that makes me so infinitely sad. We are a close family although we have our differences. We have discussions, not arguments. I may have lacked a father in my life, but I was rewarded manifold by the love of my uncles and aunts. My heart feels so heavy.
Enter Joy
I was not going to do the “year in review” or “resolutions” sort of post anyway. But I certainly want to share a beautiful ebook with you “ A Power Prism: Reflections of Source.” I had the privilege of being invited to contribute to it.
This one-of-a-kind ebook is a collaborative effort by the members of the Facets of Joy community and orchestrated by my dear friend, the lovely Joy Holland, who has the talent for original ideas. She decided, in November, to invite her community to collaborate on an ebook she planned to launch on January 1, as a gift to the world. She asked each of us two questions:
May you share with us a bit about what would you consider is the source of your power? And, what practices do you currently use to cultivate that power?
and
When doubt surfaces (does doubt surface?) what resources do you rely upon as you continue to create?
She then curated the responses, weaving energetic applications and affirmations with her beautiful photography through the book. The result: our first ever Facets of Joy community ebook.
I am grateful to Joy for including me in this book. I am proud to be a part of it. Please head over to Facets of Joy to download it for free.
It is a beautiful book with some fantastic contributions from wonderful people. I was actually going to write a separate joy – filled post to announce this book. But somehow it feels appropriate in this post, because I need strength right now when my heart hurts. Sometimes I wonder how we just move on with life, doing the usual things when our heart is weighed down with sadness. I guess the routine and the physical activity help take the edge off.
Life will go on.
As far as I am concerned, every year has losses and gains. At the end of the day, or year, I like to think that the gains far outweigh the losses, especially if we pay attention to the little things – because they all add up. Yes, they do.
I am still making my list of things to do in 2013.
Yes. No resolutions.
Only resolve and action.
Loving and giving. Growing.
If you think I can help you in any way, just let me know. Email me.
And promise me that you will:
I am so grateful for your support, as always. Happy 2013.
