Scratch My Back, Please

As it often happens with me, I was in dire need of advice. There was this friend who was supposed to be wise in the ways of the world and I went to him.
"I have a problem, dude! This world of blogging is full of back-scratchers. More often than not, I get comments on my posts only when I go and comment on others' posts. How do I get genuine comments?'
"Be the change that you want to see."
Huh! And I thought I was done with proverbs! Now what the hell did that mean, anyway? I posed the question to him.
"Do you comment on other people's posts when they do not come back and comment on yours? Do that first."
What? Here I was asking him to help me get more comments on MY blog and he was suggesting ways to increase comments on other people's blogs. What nonsense. And I thought THIS chap was wise!
"That's fine, dude, but how will that improve comments on my blog?"
"See? YOU will not comment on other people's blogs unless they comment on yours and you complain about backscratching."
Was this guy for real? The idea of commenting on people's blogs without expecting return comments! If I ever got the reputation for doing it, that would spell THE END. I mean, once people knew I would comment even if they did not comment back, they could well decide that they could use the time, that they spent on my blog, somewhere else and gain one more comment. And THIS was this wise guy's advice to improve comments on my blog? Absolute drivel!
I put this point up.
"Come on! Don't you read some blogs because you enjoy what is written?"
Ye Gods! How did this nutcase ever survive for this long? Fine, so I read blogs that entertain me but why the hell would I waste time commenting on them? All the benefit is derived once I finish reading the blog, so where was my advantage in also thinking up and typing a comment?
I am afraid that I said this rather derisively.
"You idiot! How will the author ever know that you enjoyed his writing or that you even read it?"
Holy cow! There is certainly one lunatic asylum missing an inmate. Why should I bother myself with adding to some unknown author's store of knowledge? What the hell did it matter to me what tit-bits of information that chap knew or did not know?
I could understand that someone, not knowing blogging, could not answer some questions. But THIS one belonged in the general category, so to speak. After all, what I was asking about was getting praise AND whoever heard of anyone wanting to GIVE praise? Is it not ALWAYS about getting it?
So now, will someone PLEASE scratch my back. On and around the spine between the shoulder blades. Just where I cannot reach!
P.S: I assure you that THAT was a tongue-in-cheek parody! (Except for wanting my back scratched - metaphorically!)