The act of waking up consists of a tedious internal struggle in which your resolve is put to the test, while you forsake all integrity as you squirm in the comfort of your sheets and mumble to yourself, “Five more minutes.” When you finally haul your ass out of bed, twelve snoozes later, you decide that since you’ve slept in for more than an hour already, what’s another half an hour? So you go back to sleep, completely and utterly shameless.