Diaries Magazine

The Gong Show Has Arrived, but We Got Wood…

Posted on the 13 November 2011 by Redneckprincess @RdNeckPrincess

Finally, after a month of planning and things screwing up, my friend Willow and I got our shit together enough to go get a trailer load full of wood.

I met Willow about 4 years ago at the garden center where I work, and then one day he pulled up in a 68 Mustang and we have been good friends ever since. The thing about Willow, is this…he is just as much of a clusterfuck as me. I mean that lovingly, really. It is why we are sort of kindred spirits I suppose :)

So the day started out well, I got to his place around nine, he was unloading the windows off of his trailer and getting ready to go. We got everything set up and off we went. A pit stop for gas, a bacon and egger and some coffee and we hit the road.

The place where the wood is, is about a 45 minute drive from my house. We only took a mini wrong turn, all good. We got to the big ass wood pile (I wish I had taken my camera, but I didn’t) and took a minute to figure out the best way to go about it.

The Gong show has arrived, but we got wood…

The picture above is sort of what we were working with, just add mud. Lots of mud.

So it took us about three hours to get the trailer loaded to the max. It was raining when we first started, but stopped eventually and it was actually a not bad afternoon!

After our slow descent down the mountain with a big ass load of wood, and an uneventful highway drive we get back to my house.

Now this is where it gets sketchy. The plan was to unhitch the trailer in my yard, and I would unload it in the morning. Plans are good right? Ha! Clusterfuck part starts now.

So I mention more than once to Willow, that my yard is a swamp. It’s really wet, and I need to be careful where I drive, so I don’t sink the truck into the yard. I know I said it out loud. Positive.

The wood guy that brought me the last load, sunk his truck into a monster hole near my house when he delivered the last wood.

So I park the truck semi close to where it is supposed to go, but we decide that we should maybe try and get it a little closer. The yard isn’t totally flat, so the trailer full of wood bottoms out on the back.

We take some wood out of the trailer, and Willow is going to move the truck and try and get the trailer closer. I should have been paying more attention at this point, but I was trying to get the woodpile part organized a little, and when I looked up it was just way too late…

Willow was up the back of my yard, near the shed…stuck in the grass/mud/swamp.

Now even in the summer, when it has been hot for two months, that corner of the yard is always wet, like lose the lawnmower in it wet.

Now…well, it ate half of my truck.

During this time, it has started to rain. Hard. Downpour. Torrential.

We discuss and decide that the only solution is to unload the trailer from 40 FEET AWAY. Gah.

I have one wheelbarrow, and a teenager. Both were put to good use.

We finally got all the wood off the trailer and stacked, though I would have preferred to do that in the morning when it is supposed to be dry.

We then discuss again.

We make a decision to take the trailer OFF the truck, move it by hand and then get the truck out.

Exactly what we did. Willow had to dig the truck out of the muck a little, but we got it out. My yard is a disaster now, but we got it out.

I will warm up, probably this time next week. Probably.

Tomorrow, we are going to do it all again…we had big plans to get two loads today, but that didn’t happen :) So tomorrow we get Willow’s load.

I hope I can walk or move my arms.

I hope I make it through the night.

I am too old for this. It is boys work. I am pretty sure Monday is gonna be a write off.

But I got wood. Over a cord of it. And it’s beauty.

Now, all I can hope for is to live long enough to use it all.

Happy Sunday folks…

The Gong show has arrived, but we got wood…


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