The Minority Bra Report

Posted on the 12 April 2013 by Mochiway @mochiway
Just now I came across an article on Yahoo by Nikki Ogunnaike from Glamour magazine on "The Three Bras Every Woman Should Own".  I would link the article if Yahoo isn't so fleeting with their article archive (I swear they must shoot their old articles into the internet abyss like what we do with space junk).  To make life easier, I'll just shorten the article to one sentence -- the three bras every woman should own are seamless t-shirt bras, a strapless molded-cup bra, and couple fashion bras that look pretty in style and color.  With each explanation blurb she has written on each style of bra, she includes a pretty example with the brand name and price on the side.  All these bras range from the price of $75-$110.  So as I scrolled down to read the comments, most of them weren't directed to the discussion of bras.  They were mostly flaming accusations that no women in their rights of mind would fork out $110 for a bra.  Sadly, they are not the minority.
I know that this article might trigger some anger like the woman who writes about how difficult it is to live a life being beautiful, but refrain from stoning please until the end of this blog entry.  Ever since puberty, I have viewed my boobs as my enemies, my flaw.  I remained 4'10" while my boobs became awkwardly large.  Being Chinese doesn't help it either; my Mum couldn't figure out how to deal with the situation as Chinese women don't usually have big boobs.  As we were still adjusting to living in Canada, she was at a loss trying to find a bra that fits me and fits within our budget range.  And me being the frigging angry teenager, I found bra fitting to be one of the most horrifying and torturing experience I had to endure.  My Mum would bring me different bras that she thought would fit me, I would try my best to stuff my boobs into these bras and not letting my Mum come into the changing room to help.  Of course, none of them really fit as the department stores don't carry my size (if you really must know, it's 32G).  At the end, she would get me bras in 36E and alter the clasps herself to make the bras more or less 32G.  Yet whether it was comfortable, that was an entirely different issue (and people wonder why I could be so full of angst and misery at the time, yeah, go figure eh?)
However, a 36E size bra is hard to come by, and we often had to pay the regular price ranging from $60 to $90 dollars.  So when I read the comment "no women in their rights of mind would fork out $110 for a bra", I can only sadly smile and  agree "no women in their rights of mind would fork out $110 for a bra unless they are desperate to find a bra that fits them".  For the minority women out there, I feel your pain.  And for the rest, I envy you all so much!  Not only do you gals get to buy cheap bras, but they look so pretty.  Guess what we big boobie girls get to choose from?  Grandma style.  For some reason, the designers love to stereotype big boobs with grannies.  What is up with THAT!?!  If you don't believe me, here's one of my recent buy that cost $80 something dollars.  You would think, hell that would score me some sexy bra.  Guess again.  It's the most comfortable bra I've ever worn.  Sexiness-wise.  HA!

So yeah, next time when you wish you have bigger boobs, don't.  With bigger boobs comes bigger burden.  I mean seriously!  You get the whole package -- back pain, granny style bras, and boob sweat! YES!  BOOB SWEATt!  Which leads to boobie rash and boobie acne.  If you wonder why big boobie girls like to shift their bodies around or intentionally put their arms underneath their boobs to make them seem even bigger, it's actually because their boobs are itching.  They are simply twitching or trying to sneak in a scratch underneath their boobs.  It's kind of like the guys doing the funny shifting dancing to relocate their awkward balls situation or to relief their balls itch.  Yup.  So next time when you see a girl doing that, take pity on her itchy boobs in the granny bras.