Anyone, or everyone who has lived long enough to have a taste of technology has heard of Tinder. Used it? Maybe it’s not for all of us. But for those who have the talent for thumb swiping (be it left or right), here are the people you’ve probably encountered at least once while using this pretty popular app.
1. The Over-Confident
One of the many people who jumpstart the conversation and most of the time they tend to sound something like this:
*based on a true story
A: Hi, can i sleep in the airport with you?
B: Hi there, last I heard, the airport wasn’t a nice place to sleep in.
A: Then where do you think is a nice place to sleep in?
B: In bed, especially when mine has 8 pillows.
A: Can I be the 9th Pillow?
B: HAHA are you soft and squishy? Cause that’s how i like my pillows.
A: Ohh shit I’m not. I’m kinda hard.
Okay.
That’s one type of an OCP (over-confident person) you’d find on Tinder. The other kinds include just straight up “abs as a profile picture“, or “flex it till you make it” competitions. It’s as if having such profile pictures (with or without their heads and faces included) will garner more approvals, more right swipes. They feel like they’ve got it all.
2. The disappearing act
You could consider this a sad, sad situation. Picture this. You swipe right on somebody and you guys match, hit it off with a whole day of conversation via chat, and then suddenly this person that you just thought could have been the “one” suddenly thinks he’s Harry Potter and disapparates into thin air.
Hi, hello, come back? We had a thing going. Hello from the other side (of this screen)?
3. The “Experienced”
You could classify this category of people under the “know-it-alls” or the “over-confident” ones. Their experience, however, is just one kind of experience. If, you know what I mean.
*also based on a true story
A straight up asks the girl for her social media details before even starting a conversation. Sign of an outright “stalker first, chat later” situation. The conversation resumes:
A: Do you hook up btw?
B: Nope not into that sorta thing.
A: Why not?
(B proceeds to explain anything emotionally related to “hooking up”)
Note: Hooking up, by definition ranges from kissing to actual sex.
A: Basically I’m into hook ups and dates at the same time. I’m the kinda guy who go for lust and love at the same time so yeah. What do you think of a guy like me then, who’s into love and lust?
Are you like into having fun with a guy or what? I mean, have you ever like ever hooked up before even? Hahaha.
Throughout the conversation he straight up tries to persuade the girl that hook ups could be a good thing, it might lead to dating, and that lust and love are one in the same. He even questions your experience level, because I mean, you’re supposed to be sad and alone, that’s why you’re on Tinder right? He’s just trying to educate you on the things you might never have seen before.
4. The Sweet Talker
A: Hi cutie
B: Hey
A: What are you up to?
B: I’m actually heading to bed right now, long day tomorrow.
A: Oh, so maybe you’ll text me tomorrow then? If i get a reply from you means I’ve got your attention. Do I have to fight for your attention?
Don’t get me wrong, some pickup lines do actually work. But google can only get you so far in life until it runs out of “PICK UP LINES 101”.
5. The Nice Guy
Yes, they do exist. Yes, they are a rare breed. You hit it off really well, and after awhile, you exchange contacts and you talk as friends. Nothing works out between you, but you text once in awhile to check up on one another.
So thank you guy number five. I think you’re the reason why all us girls go back to Tinder. The same reason everyone replays Pokemon over and over again – to find a rare breed.