In Ithaca, New York, where dog lovers abound, we have plenty of open woods and fields for dogs to run loose in. We also have state parks and other more formal paths where dogs are required to be on a leash.
Not all dog owners comply.
As in any system where some people follow the rules and others don't, the owners of leashed dogs often have a self-righeous look about them, as if to scold the owners of the free-wheeling dogs.
Adrian hated to put a leash on a dog. In the last five years of his life, he often took our neighbor's black lab, Roxy, for walks in the woods. He would carry the leash in his hand, but never actually put it on the dog.
Sometimes he'd put Roxy in the back of the car and take her to a friend's property where there was a pond for her to swim in and acres of fields and woods to roam. On occasion they'd get lost and I'd have to go rescue them. Adrian would come out of the woods on an unfamiliar road far from his car. Someone would lend a phone for him to call me.
Over the years, as Adrian got slower and weaker, Roxy seemed to roam farther on her own, but she always came back to him.
When Adrian reached the point where he could no longer drive a car, I'd take them out to the friend's pond. Adrian especially liked to see Roxy swim, and then to run across the field.
"Watching her run free," he said to me, "is one of the only pleasures left in my life."
After Adrian died, Roxy would still come looking for him. I almost felt that he was trying to speak to me through her. One day she was waiting for me in the driveway when I came home. I hugged her and cried.
Time passed and Roxy stopped coming around. Then one day when I opened the garage door, there she was. She stood by the car door, anxious and whining. She wanted to get into the car.
I couldn't get her to leave and thought about taking her with me, but I was on my way to pick up my granddaughter at school and take her to her piano lesson. It was no place for a dog.
Reluctantly, I called the neighbor's house, and their son came for Roxy. But she wouldn't listen to him, either.
Finally, he held onto her until I left in the car.
These days, Roxy doesn't come around any more.
