I'm having memories of family not listening to me through my whole divorce (separation). For a long time, they wanted to believe that I wasn't a battered woman and that my ex didn't emotionally abuse me. They wanted to instead believe that I was skitzophrenic and that I was imagining things.
They didn't want to believe that my ex was saying all kinds of things. They finally believe that now. My Dad one day sat them down and told all four of them (sister, brother and the in laws) that they aren't there to know what happens behind closed doors.
There was also a guy involved in the whole mess, that my sister and probably others are choosing to believe just didn't exist. Just last night, my sister was telling me that none of it ever happened and it really pissed me off.
For anything that happens in a person's life, can other's honestly say that it didn't happen? They can only speculate and can never be 100% sure in their decision as they were not the ones in my shoes.
I don't care to rehash the whole nasty past, but I will say it started by my neighbor. I didn't know his name during the time, but I did get a phone call confession from him at the end of the whole thing. His name was Jeremy. Or should I say JERK.
I never told my friends and family that the guy called as they listened quickly as I told them that the guy made a confession that he was indeed talking about me and wanting to break up my marriage. Instead friends and family chose to let it go in one ear and out the other and say, "I don't know and then go on to talk about mental illness, so I chose not to go more in depth about the confession. I could see I was going to lead a dead horse to water.
But anyway, how it began was Jeremy seeing me in the bathroom undressing one night. My screens were open, it was summer time and I could hear him out there with his friends having a party. And I heard one of them say, "Look at the tits on her." Now, I didn't imagine hearing that.
And then, I quickly discovered that he worked at the nearby grocery store. I had gone to the grocery store a few days later and was standing a few yards away from the meat counter and I heard one of the two guys saying, "I know where you can find a nude Mrs. Fay." And then I looked again and one of them was resting his arms on the counter, staring right at me looking at me and grinning for about five minutes.
Now, anyone means to tell me that I imagined that? Come on! I was only a few yards away from him. I would go each week or more than that and stand a few yards away from the two guys as they talked about me, my ex's name came up a lot and they talked about the incidents that were happening at my house. My kids names came up while I was standing a few yards away from the guys at the meat counter.
He started out as a pervert, then a royal jerk.
I'd like to see anyone hop into my shoes and listen to a guy say, "I know where you can find a nude Mrs. Fay." and only be a few yards away from him and then go on to say you imagined it.
IT DOESN'T WORK LIKE THAT.
I told my sister, I don't plan to talk to her until she can owe me an apology.
There was a lot more that went on, but that's the beginning of the whole thing. I know for a fact, I heard him, and I heard my ex correctly. I got a phone call confession from Jeremy.
Jennifer Jo Fay
Copyrighted August 10, 2012